By caroline
Date: 14 December 1997

Thank you and good bye

How is it that after all is said and done, 
a person can still have the power to twist 
the knife in your back, and step on the few
 broken peices left of your heart after they 
got done with it?  How is it that whoever 
runs this crazy world we live in would give 
anyone that power over a person?  Is a a 
weakness of mine?  Why do i fall in his wake?  
I am strong enough to go on...why wont he let
 me?   I could go on, survive, and learn to 
love again.  But with every step  i take 
forward, the knife in my back turns two turns
 to my one.  I am not your personal door mat, 
i am not someone for you to shit on to feel 
better about yourself, and i am not a part 
of you or what we were.  I am ME!!! plain 
and simple i am strong, i am good, and i 
deserve more than you could ever give me.   
I am not here to boost your self worth, or 
to make you feel more of a man, or any of 
these things.  I am here to stand up for 
myself, and love myself like you never did.  
Or would never admit.  You will no longer 
use me as your stepping stone, door mat, 
or punching bag.  You will treat me only 
with respect, or you will remove yourself 
from my presence once and for all.  From 
this moment on, i am my own advocate, and 
i put myself first...since no one else will.  
I am finally able to stand on my own two feet.  
If there is one thing i can say.  It is thank 
you....thank you you ask?  Yes, for giving me 
the strength to pull away from the nothingness 
i was part of and become the something that is 
me.  More than you will ever know, or be able to 
love.  Thank you, and good bye....