By Ali
Date: 25 December 2000
Trying To Find
I'm trying to find my way
The eternal struggle back to self
A self that can never be found
But no one seems to realize
That the lost are always lost
And the blind will never see
And if I take one step forward
And two steps back
Then I'll fall back to you
Back to what I think was grace
But grace is over-rated
A tired myth from the past
So, take this poisin
From my lips
One kiss, is all it takes
Relieve me of this venom
While, you're at it
Take away my fangs
For, I'm the only snake
Who won't ever bite
What's the use
I'll never get this done
Never get this out
Never get back to me
Or is it you?
So, take this picture
Of an honest, sweet goodbye
'Cause, love, it's all a lie
I never did get that bittersweet kiss
That final goodbye
You've run away, haven't gotten very far
Just gone back to a place
You've already been
Hoping to find release from within
Can't let yourself feel
Can't let yourself love
Never get too close
And nothing is real
Don't touch the fire
Unless you want a burn
Run away, lover, and you'll never learn
But the lesson's not important
If you won't see my face...
And I had no defenses against you
No way to see
No way out
In silence you called out my name
But I was too shattered to even hear
What you refused to say
So, stay where you are
If you can't come back
Feel the cold
Feel the heat
But not the pain
But, I know it's in there
Somewhere
Don't believe my lies, baby
Really, I don't miss you
And, this will all wear away
And one day I'll fall
Fall back to grace
And maybe by then
You'll be done
Falling apart
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