By me aka Niki Fullmoonlover69@yahoo.com
Date: 17 December 2000
once upon a time
It's been 4 weeks, 4 days and to many hours since the last time I kissed you
Now, a month later I'm beginning to get the feeling that i'm getting over you
I'm scared and happy at the same time
I'm scared because I'm afraid I'll forget, forget the memories, the love and us
I'm scared that the next time I look into your eyes My heart won't start racing and that there will not be electricity between us
I'm beginning to accept everything that happend
And with that acceptance comes forgiveness and I'm beginning to see not thru the eyes that love you so much
I'm scared because more and more i'm accepting that the 'us' is over, even though it died 4 weeks, 4 days and so many hours ago
I'm scared because I'm getting the feeling I don't want you anymore and we won't start something again
But even though I know it's maybe better, I have to confess I'll miss it and it's going to be strange not to mean anything to each other won't it?
I'm beginning to think you don't care and seeing the possibility you never did, it kills me
I'm beginning to think I'm not in love anymore, It's breaking me
I'm almost over you, aren't I?
But I'm happy because I feel that the next time I'll see you, I won't want you so bad and know you are not mine to have
I'm happy because the next time I hear you talking to her on the phone and call her darling I won't care
I'm happy because I won' wish to be her, just to hold you close
I'm, happy because you can't hurt me with anything you say
I don't care anymore, remember?
I'm happy because there will be no more lonliness and heartache
I'm happy because my mind is back on track and I won't cry myself to sleep
I'm happy because, just because I guess
But I think that maybe someday we'll be together , once more
They say set it free and if it comes back you know for sure that it's yours
So here I am trying to let go, trying to forget,not going back
If you come back who knows
I hope that everything that happend between us has left a mark in your mind and I hope in your heart and soul
I love you, to death maybe
But i'm not in love, anymore
Reality hit me today and the truth came, it's hard but I have to sort it out on my own, with myself
I'm afraid to forget everything , you and me
I'm happy because no more loneliness,missing, crying and heartache
I'm going on with my life and I'm grateful that I was yours and you were mine
once upon a time anyway
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