By Zero #1
Date: 2001 Jul 13
Comment on this Work
[[2001.07.13.15.06.30239]]

If Only She Could Hear My Thoughts

I'm still sitting here next to my phone.
I'm actually listening to the words inside my head
go 'round and 'round
trying to shut them up...
Ahh...man there are so many thoughts in there...
Like if I was to talk to anyone else but her,
the whole world would unravel and the fabric of creation
would cease to exist
Almost as if it's too deep for anyone else to take in
(she can hold it)
I can tell it by the way her eyes look in mine
not just being beautiful..oh so beautiful
but they almost glow as if every word that I speak unveils
some sort of mystery to her.
I can't understand it..none of my other "friends" can do that
None of my other enemies can do that
so why can she?
I don't know..maybe it's useless asking,,or maybe I already know the answer
And every time she's around, just the way her proud body moves,,the way her arms rest gently by her side, the way she smiles and runs her fingers through her hair at the same time, almost as if trying to tell me something......
.......
what is it that she's saying?
...maybe my mind can't hold it,,,,but maybe
just maybe my mind doesn't have to hold it,,it just has to hold
her.............*sigh* now there's a chance I never took
...unnggg..don't know if I can..don't know if I will....
I want to pick up the phone and call her back and let her know
how..
   I...
      feel...soooooo bad......
but what would she say?
How would she take it?
I mean we've always been best friends???

Only if she was here right now...she wouldn't let me walk away from this...she wouldn't let me walk away from her..
She just flat out wouldn't let me walk away..like I've always done...
Holding in my feelings in for her because of friendship
the most modest irony of them all.
I need her help the most...but I can't put out the words to make her listen.........if only she could hear my thoughts.