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By gardenguru Date: 2001 Jul 27 Comment on this Work [[2001.07.27.21.51.22237]] |
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IF YOU HAVE TO ASK... "Does he love me, Do I love him?" If you have to ask, then something's missing. It's not like the romantic's say: love doesn't bonk you on the head big time and let you know it's there, when it's there. Love doesn't come to you as the BIG TRUTH, the black and white that just can't be mistaken. BUT...There's an ocean, a continent, a universe between the BIG BONK and the missing boink. When uncertainly sits atop your shoulder, when sleep is something you'll do tomorrow night, when monstrous questions sneak out of your heart and find a place on the internet, then something's missing. The romantics have it easy: they believe. The rest of us sit somewhere between the BIG TRUTH and the missing boink. The answer just isn't really there. So we move on. We move on to reality -- "can he use THAT word in this forum for romance?", everyone asks -- Reality is knowing no one's perfect, you're not perfect, the other person's not perfect, and, hokey smokes, no partnership is perfect. Reality is knowing that relationships take work, a BIG GIANT SHITLOAD of work. Working past the uncertainties of each other, uncertainties of a relationship, and certainly, most importantly, uncertainties of life. It's a long, heart-wrenching long way between now and the end of a good relationship. Don't ask "is it/he right?" Ask yourself, "do I want to work at it?" As one of my favorite movieland faeries once said: "Do ya have the grit, pilgrim?" |