By Prize
Date: 2001 Nov 19
Comment on this Work
[[2001.11.19.11.43.6177]]

The Coldness of Loneliness

Cold chills all over my body
Little tingles marching like an army
Down my spine
Down...down...down
Extending to my extremities
Consuming my entire body
I pull my coat tighter around me
But no warmth is to be found
The coldness cuts through me
Sharp as a knife and scraping the bones...
Restless night
Get up
Work out
Bathe
Work
Eat
Restless night
Sleep is no escape
Dreams have turned against me
My dreams are fantasy, not real
You taught me
You teach me
Be sensible
Be rational
Be practical
We have boulders in our path of gravel
Attempting to move them would tear us apart
So you tear us apart instead
Or did I tear us apart
By not settling for a mere friendship
I should be grateful to have a friend like you
But I love you more than a friend
And my love is dependent
The dependency scares you, scares me
So I let you go...I said goodbye...now your gone
Being sensible
Being rational
Being practical
But nothing is the same without you
How I miss you...immeasurable...
I wonder the path of gravel
And I climb on the big boulders
Searching for you on the path...our path
But I am all alone
The wind blows hard through the emptiness
Transporting me back through time and space
I am back in reality
Sitting quietly at the big round table
Listening to my coworkers, taking the minutes
I look up from my screen and into their faces
Someone catches my eye...what's wrong?
I'm fine...{smile}...through blurry, tear filled eyes
I'm fine...I'm fine...I'm fine
{I'm not fine}
I miss you
I want you
I need you
My darling...I am so very cold.
How do I find warmth without you?