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By Jon Date: 2002 Jun 14 Comment on this Work [[2002.06.14.22.06.8630]] |
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I just can't write anymore. My inspiration is gone, and I just can't write how I used too. It used to come so easily to me, but now I just stare at the screen with a blank look on my face and a frustrated feeling in my heart. I know I'm not dead inside just yet so I can't understand why it's so hard for me to put my thoughts together. It's making me crazy. The only thing I am able to write about are flashbacks of our moments together in love. And I don't even know what to feel while I'm writing them. I'm grasping for straws that aren't even there. The only feeling that I can describe right now is hate. I hate you for leaving me. I hate what you did. I hate how weak you are. I hate how weak I am. I hate fate. I hate love. I hate you. I hate the fact that you were my inspiration, the ink in my pen, the thud in my heart...my muse. I hate the fact that not only can I not live a worthwhile life without you but I can't write either. You took away the one thing that was keeping me sane and my demons away. And that makes me hate you even more. |