By Crystal
Date: 2002 Oct 04
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[[2002.10.04.18.09.10094]]

Disturbing Proof

I never fantasized as a child,
About being rich,
Driving nice cars,
Having nice things,
Or living in a mansion.
  
My fantasies were of Loving and being Loved.

At 22 years old,
I thought I had found that,
I thought I had found that in you.
And five years later,
Tired of the lies,
The hurtful words,
The abuse...
I find myself exhausted from being all I could,
And doing what I could to make you happy.

And even though I know I did nothing wrong,
I still find myself sometimes wondering,
If maybe, just maybe it was my fault,
For loving you,
letting you trample all over me,
And never walking away,
Just to prove to you that I did.