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By Misti Date: 2004 Oct 20 Comment on this Work [[2004.10.20.03.41.9288]] |
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men sleep snoring beside me all my life this is familiar yes I know this agony all too well men sleep snoring beside me as I writhe in hell silently aching all over not just one small sweet part he thinks they think it's about sex how I always want it but no sometimes all I need is this: his arms around me him reaching for me even in sleep him facing me his back not turned to me if he is talking in his sleep he is saying my name oh this game is stupid and I've forgotten all the rules I made he made they made by now these men sleeping snoring beside me them snug in REM me thinking things I can never Etch A Sketch away the cramps are coming I can't find the pills in the dark even with my little green flashlight what will I wear tomorrow what face will I put on the man with the beard in the coffee shop talked wearily to himself What Do You Want Now? Okay, Okay I Know I Know I sat waiting for another man drinking gourmet coffee from a flowery Special Secretary mug thinking thoughts more bitter than the coffee I can never remember how much sugar it takes oh the fakes in my life the flakes in my life I once was a wife and now I point out a studio loft in Nob Hill in the Lobo to my boyfriend and he says Let's Rent it Right Away he is playing with me like he does because I am ready and he isn't even though we spend every night together and tonight is familiar he is sleeping and I'm not I cried but not for long I am getting stronger. |