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By darwin Date: 2005 Aug 08 Comment on this Work [[2005.08.08.16.15.20868]] |
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most days i feel that i am just winging it. that it's nothing more then a fools try. i can hear the conversations, i can see the lips moving, and i can add the two cents when need, but it all feels a dream. maybe it's because i am self conscious. but that's not it. i feel like that all the time, like i'm not quite hearing what is being said. and that what i am saying is in some other language then my own. and somewhere it's lost in translation. it's isolating. and it's lonely. and i often feel lost in my own thoughts, and i want to find a place to hide away. though this is sometimes broken in periods of ecstasy. moments where i feel lost in ethustiastic bliss. most often when i find him next to me, and i don't feel that tension to speak, that tension to be heard or to hear. and often when i find his hands closing in around my fingers, and his warmth creates circuits direct to all my senses. i'm just a fool in a play the rest of the time. a fools bid. |