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By sapphyres_serenade Date: 2008 Oct 09 Comment on this Work [[2008.10.09.07.23.3097]] |
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It’s always been Like this with you Marriage is a two-way street To be give and take For us it is Not quite as intended Rather than both of us, Giving our share and Taking in turn That's tradition, Ours is one where I have gone on giving While you continue To scheme and take. Selfish some may call you So right they are, Even if they do not know I bend to your whims, Held here day & night A decade I've been, At your beck and call. Abuse some may say, Never physical, no hands laid, Only emotional or spiritual Abuse leaves no marks No proof of damage done No way to show the world How you've made me hurt. Friends exist, though I hide mine from view You’ll ask to meet, Then turn and hate Your eyes see them Taking me from you, Though not the truth, Just friends not dates. Years ago you strayed, Not three months past Our wedding date, I left for the 4th of July, That little tramp, 18, Tall thin, oh so pretty, I saw her on our street, Foolishly trusting, believing. The truth will set you free, Or so they say Freedom has a price, Too rich for my blood Excuses to be had, Married you could be, Be with others, not just me. This one way street, Running for you alone The double standards Started there, They haven’t stopped, Though you don't care. Again you say its 'who you are', Or you cannot change, I know better, You enjoy your freedom Too much too change. Years ago change you did demand Of me to stay with you If I did not fix myself You said I didn’t love you. Change I did Not just for you. Not just changed, I grew up its true. Up yes, grew stronger no Still here for you to boss around. You used to go out With your best friends My job to sit at home Bored, alone and wait. Money that I made Was yours to take And spend as you saw fit, Again I give and still you take. Now time has passed, New friends I've made Met them once, You do not trust me or them Always asking if I’m cheating Sleeping around behind your back That my friends have Set me up with another man That you would never know, However it’s just not true. Still I give and give again, My friends my only release I hang out with them Least once a week So I do not explode, Or go insane From feelings kept inside. I wish you trusted me To simply be your wife To some extent you do, But I know that I'm your slave The one whose heart you break With caustic lines and jokes you say “Where've you been, its 10pm, I've been calling you since 9, With your boyfriend you must be” You see no good reason For me to hang with friends of mine And help some people out, Even when I tell the truth You’re always filled with doubt Every time I leave the house, Endlessly you call to keep Good track of every move, Like a child, you have to watch. I’m growing bored and tired Playing these foolish games You’re the cat and I’m the mouse I've given my fair share, ‘Tis time to take my due. You go out and play Poker for days on end Without even a call to Tell me you're not dead. Yet I get my ass chewed If I'm gone three hours. I wish this nightmare cycle Had an end, the give and take Would soon equate To what marriage really is Lovely daydream it would be, But I'm not in control you see. I am just the puppet, My strings you always pull Break my heart, my spirit too, Distrust my truth one day The next you apologize Swear its wrong of you To act this way, Yet you call & bitch that I’m not there with you. Home I rush to be at your side, To find you want to hide behind The screen to which you're glued, A movie or a poker game It seem I'm not enough for you. Demanded I come home, No longer happy and content, Was watching movies And laughing with friends, Now here I am I’m home at last Your shouts of anger and rage At things not going your way. You lost your game Cuz I came in the door You remind me yet again That I once again was late Lest I forget I'm not allowed To be the one who takes. |