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By Farah Submitted by twisted_lie Date: 2009 Jul 01 Comment on this Work [[2009.07.01.07.53.18342]] |
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Dearest heart, I have come to the conclusion that this can't go on any further. We have both reached that point in our relationship where we should go our separate ways. Emotionally and mentally we have not been on the same page for a while now. I can't deny that I was hung on that last ray of hope, until I realized that you had a different dream to pursue, a dream that I was not part of, that I will never be part of. It only hurts me that you assumed that I will not understand that I will not support you to become the person that you want to be, that I will not wait for you until eternity. Two more years would've never done any difference to me, but that was only when I was 100% sure that only I lived in your heart and mind, when I was 100% that I was your number one priority. And once doubt is in, you can never let go of the shadow of that feeling. I have read your email thoroughly and I won't lie to you, it rose up a lot of questions into mind, I read it over and over again, only to find out that you think so little of me, so little of everything that we shared together, and that by itself is a serious problem. At one time, we had it all, we thought alike, we were one, but now things have changed, we are obviously on two totally different directions in life. I apologize for all the hurt that I caused you, for the time that I couldn't understand you, for everything that offended you, but I am human after all. I will not start throwing the blame, I will not point fingers, I will not accuse you of guilt, but instead I choose to thank you for the most amazing 5 years in my life. I would never change anything about these years, even if I had the power to do so. I believe that I have learned a lot about relationships, as so have you, I understood how difficult it is to maintain a strong tie between a couple, and how much work it needs. I have done my best within my capability, I had my reasons, those that you wish not to believe, and I promise you that everything I have done, I've only done it out of love for you. But as you mentioned it came to the point where you stop to care, where you are no longer interested and you seek your own comfort in a place where you feel welcomed. I found my new home at work, I have volunteered to work with kids and they are taking most of my time. For what it's worth I have remained faithful and loyal to you for the past five years, and it could've been a lifetime, but as I said before, we each live on a different continent, we don't share thoughts, ideas and feelings and that in my opinion was our number one problem. Not to mention that we both started doubting one another, and once the circle of trust is gone, there is no foundation to stand on. I never asked you to marry me, I never asked for a ring, I was willing to give you all the time in the world but you were never honest with me and most importantly with yourself since the start. You have given me false hopes and illusions and have put yourself under pressure, just so that you don't hurt me, but that hurt me even more. All I ever wanted was to see you happy, and our last conversation was like a wake up call, if you had really loved me you wouldn't have done anything that would hurt us, I am not saying that to hurt you or to piss you off, rest assure that I am only shedding light that maybe both of you wanted this to work out that we started ignoring our own feelings in order to please each other. Allow me to give you a piece of advice for your future; in order to be true with the one you love, you should be true to yourself first, always put yourself in the other person's shoes, think of how they will react and what they will feel. Think before you speak, calculate the outcome of a situation. Don't be hasty and don’t give a reaction when you are angry. Be spontaneous, the most beautiful things in life happen when we least expect them. Love and love and love till every cell in your body explode with hearts and fussy warm feelings. Do something special every now and then. MAKE SURE AHILHA MISH 3OGAD,w opened minded, so that you can go out together and could actually have a relationship, after all you don’t want history to repeat itself =) You have taught me so much and the most important thing is that you taught me how to love, I may have not loved you that way that you wanted but I have loved you the only way I knew. Nobody can deny or will ever deny what a big role you played in my life and how supportive and caring you were. I will never forget anything you have done for me; after all you are my first and everlasting "special person in my life". In my heart there will always be this corner that is named after you. I appreciate everything you have done; the times you defended me, I thank you for the security you have made me feel, and I am filled with gratitude with the peace of mind you have given me. I am grateful from the depths of my heart for all the beautiful moments we shared and all the sad ones we've overcome. You know you are unique as I am too, and I want to make sure that you know that you possess the most beautiful and loving soul I have ever met or will ever meet. I am not sorry that it all ended this way; on the contrary I am very happy that I had the chance to experience this rollercoaster with someone like you. May you find what you are looking for in life and May you share it with someone who knows how precious you are. I wish you all the success in life and may you always follow your dreams and shine like a star I know you are. Your once upon a time crazy in love with you "Farah". |