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By Jon Date: 2010 Mar 09 Comment on this Work [[2010.03.09.19.00.10511]] |
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There will always be words that I’ve spoken or written that I’ll always regret. Reading them again or hearing myself say them again in my mind brings me to a regretful time of my life with her, when I lost myself. I hurt her, and in more ways than I thought possible I hurt myself. I hold onto the time when we had everything in front of us. The road ahead was still being paved, and what we left behind were memories and moments that would bond us for the trip ahead. Even with the promise we held I took her down a road without me. I forced her to walk alone. To shelter the storm of my anger, my selfishness with her love for me. She endured far longer than I deserved. With no end in sight, she left. The cliché saying is “if you love something let it go, if it comes back it’s meant to be.” We let each other go. Somehow through small miracles in the redundancy and mundane features of life we found each other again. I can’t take back what I’ve said or what I’ve done. It still hurts her. It still hurts me. But I can hope that the words spoken from now on will not replace the ones already said but the sincerity of it will be felt and I won’t be forgiven or redeemed but we can start anew. If I ever write anything worth writing again, it will be for her. The road ahead is still being paved. She will never walk alone. I love you baby. |