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By Star of David Date: 2011 Nov 25 Comment on this Work [[2011.11.25.05.08.6312]] |
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Breakups should come with: · Directives · Basic Instructions · Guidelines for Extreme Action · Disclaimers · Emergency Action (if required) · And, like all good fairy tales, a Life Lesson · Followed by a Warning · And a very heavy instruction manual (this can be filled with random content) Directives: · Do not look back · Do whatever it takes · Rise again · Love again Basic Instructions: · Block on Facebook · Ditto, all similar apps · Ditto chat apps · Ditto Skype · Ditto everything else · Delete on phone · Activate call block · Trash all SMS · Trash all emails · Then empty all trash bins Guidelines for Extreme Action: · Erase from heart entirely · Wipe out from memory (electric shock therapy recommended, if intoxication fails) · Replace (with updated/improved version) Disclaimers: · Basic Instructions are relatively easy to follow, but require much discipline. · Extreme action may be impossible to achieve satisfactorily. Ever. · If heart does not heal, refer ‘Emergency Action’. Emergency Action: · Hit self on head with instruction manual till darkness descends. · Repeat each time consciousness comes around. Life Lesson: · When all else fails, sometimes mind-numbing violence wins the day. Warning: · None of this may work. |