By Katrina Bass
Date: 5 September 1997

Confused Love

When I am not with him....
Talking to him that is.......
I miss him and his loving words..

But when I am talking to him....
There is this pressure I feel...
A pressure to be able to feel the same way..

I want him to help me...
Help me not feel that prssure..
But it is a prssure I bring on myself..
Nothing he is guilty of...

He is in love ... 
And it is his first true love..
He is so open with his feelings..
And I am so confussed about mine..

The only thing he is guilty of ....
Is being in love....
And the only thing I am guilty of..
Is not knowing how to accept love..

I feel love comes with conditions..
When really it is only love when given freely..

I know that is what he means to give...
And for all I know that may be what he is giving..

But i know I am his first love....
And I want so much to give that love in return....
But he is much younger....
And I am much older....

But I do love him ....
Just can't promise him anything .....
Because I feel our love is a different kind of love....

The lord only knows what the future brings...
But for this moment in time ...
I can only love him as a true friend...

And I just pray he can accept that...
Because believe me....
If I could make myself be more....
It would be.....

But it has to come from the heart....
And it has to be given freely....
And until I can do that......
A friend is all I can be...

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