By Misti Velvet Rainwater
Date: 5 November 1998

sedated

you plied me with chardonnay
you appeased me with
   a Kamikaze
knowing I'm easier
   when sedated
the sharp edges blur
  and I'm the good girl
    I was meant
      to be

my body takes over
   gives my brain
    a vacation
and all is sensation
 a carnal fest
everything reduced
 to your mouth
  on my breasts

I feel hated
 when I'm sedated
I'm supposed to
 stay on my toes
a determined ballerina
 keep myself in a box
opened only by a precious few
  who unlike you
want to see me shine
   not fall
   not break

You take
  me like 
I'm a piece of candy
 a small bit of flavor
   to savor 
until you have time 
    to eat

Once Again I am beaten
   at the same game
 the same game you always
    effortlessly win

again the weird star rises
  in my sky
and there's nothing left
    for me
  but to die