By Tony K (tny@ix.netcom.com)
Date: 31 March 1998

What's the matter with you?

In my mirror, lights of blue and red flash.
Here comes an officer with a big mustache.
I sit dazed and confused within my car.
I roll down my window, but not too far.

The officer says to me in an angry tone:
"You were doing 54 in a 35 zone!
Indeed, I got you on my radar
Exceeding the limit by this far.
You illegally used a turning lane
and bolted like a bullet train
to pass a Honda Accord
and a rusty blue ford.
You ran through a four way stop.
I suppose you didn't see the cop.
If you didn't notice, the light was red.
Thank the stars that no one is dead!
That would have been a shame.
Do you think this a game?
Do you think this is fun?
You almost hit a nun!
You should have your head checked!
You're a perfect nutcase, I suspect.
Hello? Have you no clue?
What is the matter with you?!?"

Dizzily I make my reply:
"Sorry sir.  I cannot lie.
My mind is not with me today.
It was elsewhere I'm sad to say.
Well…uh…it's like this, you see."
I desperately continue with my plea
as the officer glares down from above.
"My head's not clear 'cause I'm madly in love."