By sinneD
Date: 14 July 1999

admission

in my life where i took
forever as a lie
and no man 'cept them angels
have the power to fly
none stand so tall as to
touch the heaven above
nor short to see me crawling,
dying coz of love

i said with much conviction
that every man's unkind
the heart is but an organ
and love sprung from the mind
blame me not coz no one
helped me in my pain
nor cared to listen to me
when i can speak again

words of love were liars words
my fault was i believed
i believed her words and promises
and so i was deceived
so don't ask what compelled me to
fashion lies of my own
an angry heart can do so much
on nights spent alone

letters sent to those i chose
to feel my wrath and scorn
i filled them all with roses but
in each, a poisoned thorn
and opening their heart to me
i let the cold wind in
and left them crying on their own,
i took that as a win

but when i laughed i was not happy
though when i cried i was sad
revenge they say is sweet entirely
but why did i feel bad?
does hurting someone when you're hurt
ease the sufferings inside?
my life thought me the answer's no
it didn't revive my pride

to those i pledged a love that's true
forgive me for that lie
and thanks for loving me inspite
those nights i made you cry
no love came from me, not an ounce,
not even a single drop
but i have paid the price because
i fell on my own trap

to you who loves me now, do you know,
you fly like angels do,
you can touch the heaven and still look down
to see me crawling too
but after all these words i've written,
dark secrets i conceived-
i love you 'til forever fades-
will you still believe?