By kevin urenda, stillklulessafteralltheseyears
Date: 2 July 1999

To an almost former lover

I should have known I should have known
that she could not relate to me
not simply because I was neither out
to fuck her or to fuck her over
but because I was too naive to pick up
on the concept that
others could have expectations of love
far less than what
I have always wanted to share
I should have known
that she had been reprogrammed by her life
and that she had mistaken
my admiration of her inner beauty
as something I planned to use
against her like a switchblade to the soul
in a dark alley of some future fight
I should have known
that what I dream of when I dream of
love so pure are thoughts that had been
killed within her heart long ago
I should have known
that what I considered normal
was instead some alien behavior that
she would never think of as
something she could attain or match or even deserve
I should have known
to spend more time learning to communicate
in the language of her heart
than trying to reach her with a love
her heart no longer spoke

07.02.99
 
 

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