By kevin urenda, kluless70@hotmail.com
Date: 18 December 1998

How is it going?

(A friend of mine always responds to that question with
“Too early to tell, too late to care.”)

Well, a good question on this day. 
ONE hell of a week.
I sit here knowing that your computer 
has been rendered unusable
and in abject fear that I have no control
over the fact that you might have been 
taken from me forever.
rendered unusable...

Roller coaster is not even close to 
capturing the gamut of a week in 
the life of THIS heart.
But especially THIS week...

So it feels easier to compose a few words than to 
compose myself
So out of control
So lost in despair
Overtaken by events
So out of touch 
So alone with my thoughts
Overtaken by my heart

The beating of my heart
The ticking of the clock
cannot capture this rhythm
cannot hint at the truths that are more shaken
today than yesterday
hoping for solace, reaching for peace
grasping at anything to reinforce my belief in myself
yet realizing solace is impossible
and peace only fleeting comfort
and that being alone with only my mind for company
is where Hell is...

How is it going?

Too soon to tell, but the sun still rises
So it is never, ever too late to care.

12/18/98


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