By erin
Date: 26 October 1999

I wish

No tears have fallen
for you
  or
on account of you
for a while now.

And now
I know to a degree
you will never be mine

(Behind closed doors
 you radiate
 and think only of me.)

And you toss me
Clandestine glances
in the rearview mirror
(and I'm sitting next to her)
And my cheeks Burst with Happiness
  then deflate
like a balloon animal
  thoughtlessly popped by the kid
  who doesn't know she's hurting anyone
Ex-Girlfriend and Best Friend
and sometimes the feeling 
of Guilt tears and gnashes at my heart
  because i love her
But mostly I look at her with
eyes the colour of Jealousy
and I will her away from you as
  she moves closer.

    I don't know what to do
and I don't know what to say
and I don't know how to act
and I don't know how to cry
and I wish I could
and I wish I could
and I wish 
and I wish 
    I wish  
    I wish.