By The Guppy
Date: 30 August 1999

minutes

for now, all is pretty damn good, if i must say so myself
figure i must say so myself...otherwise i wouldn't be saying it, now would i?
i suppose someone else could say it so themselves, but that just wouldn't be me
i hope
unless i have multiple personalities
for now, me and my newfound liquid lover are all interwoven
not that that's a good thing, but, i can't say it's all that bad
she, being silent and cold, yet somehow warming
instilling some sense of muddled clarity
and i, knowing that spending more time with her will just make the clarity 
that much
more
muddled
her common name would be "white russian"
her latin name would be unbeknownst to me
"rusko wittae" perhaps
i just call her "eve"
yeah, i know that's nowhere near being russian in nomenclative properties
that's my problem, not yours
you can call her "nikita" or "tasha" or whatever you want
the name means little
she's my surrogate lover for the evening
just thought i'd introduce her
eve's been listening to me whine all night...well, not all night really
that's just her take on it all
she's been a good sport though...very reassuring
me, well, i've been kinda needing her type for the past few weeks
just kinda got the mean reds (if i may borrow a phrase from audrey, my goddess)
something about hearing muffled cries for help
something about friends walking razor thin lines
or snorting them
something about handguns and theft and alcohol and hopelessness
just being witnessed
alcohol
ha
eve would never do anything bad to me
never
?
I, with so much time devoted to romantic thoughts, am now too concerned
with love