By jlorenz@saber.net
Date: 22 August 1999

Mother Confessor

I think it is time to make your public confession. When I wrote to encourage you you pretended you liked me . I told you my innermost secrets, then you turned what I told you back on me to take advantage of me. To use another's vulnerability against them, is that your habit? Instead of a romantic friend do you turn out to be the Lorena Bobbitt of the internet? I offered you love, you cut me off without mercy. And all the time I mistook you for a lady with whom I thought love was possible. I now see how you want everything your way, top to bottom, to have this drivelling fool come worship you in your little glass house, in your little deserted forest, so that you can have in thrall another naive idiot that you can keep among your little baubles and play things. You are indeed more than a little bit a predator. It must make you pant there in the darkness of your room to caress your ego, and strip away the layers of your own shabby chiffon to excite yourself while you tease the lovelorn online with your phony maiden act, leaving your prey ingloriously naked as you tease him shamelessly into cybersex, then tease him some more with "going slow" and "I never said I was in love". You have the nerve then to call HIM "mean spirited and spiteful" when he catches on and feels used by you . You then concoct your own pity party and excuse yourself saying,--"oh, I am this way because of my abused past" - when really what you are is a slut walking down the street in cut-off jeans and minimal tank, hair swinging, never admitting that all the while you were really thinking about deciding on which man to DESTROY today. Even now your words are so convincing, that you make me wonder now as I re-read your email , written at a time when each of us stared at our screens and touched our private thoughts, if what you said really was beautiful sentiments or merely the autoexpression of a witch riding her power trips to new highs. A bitch tasting the black- silk- blindfolded depths of her own fancies as she strained at the constraints of decency to whip up her contrived lover's lust? You say you don't want to throw away our friendship, and that I should reconsider my hasty retreat. At this point I don't know whether I am to bow down and feel licked in the face of your treachery or just wait til you turn on me again without warning and spank my emotions again until I'm sore? I, being not quite as brave as I should have been before now, finally have had enough and will return the spankings to you, in the form of a tongue lashing because I am still angry. I'm sure you get off in the wee hours of the night concocting your cock'n'bull stories of your supposedly abused lovelife so you can again try to shame me before the open frontroom window of your bordello fantasies, where voyeurs with lighted computer screens are your audience and you give them a blow by blow account in your sleazy long letters to family and friends. In reality, you'd like to have two men online, maybe three at once, and have sex with all of them until you passed out. You then would crow to your family and friends that men are such shameful creatures who are always on the lookout to abuse an innocent, happy-go- lucky, funloving romantic girl. Nope, sorry Jezebel, that public persona belies your real taste for blood. You have learned all too well to hide your fangs. But now I think it is time for someone to pull back the curtain on you, let in the light, and drive a stake through your heart so as to warn the world about the real you and the dangers of cyber dating.
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