By slug
Date: 5 November 2000

Criminal

I'm not a virgin.
This is not news.
I'm offering up my sins to you  
                   as if you could save me

                                      and you're the one i sinned against.

forgiveness is a form of savior,


                                  but i'm not worthy of forgiving.

because my eyes closed,
                       and i was resisting,
              thinking of you until our lips met.

then it was him (and years of pent-up bad timing)
                  spilling out into the night,
                  crashing against our mouths-
                  drying up the tears i'll cry

                                                as i confess to you...

because he is my addiction,
    and you are my methadone clinic.
        He is the one i can't get over,
    and you are the one i'm trying to get under...
because you are new and different and there are butterflies that wing into my stomach as we dance,
    and he doesn't even dance.

the words were gone -
    words that would never do you justice,
and now i'm looking for a reason
                                 to justify my good intentions that went awry.

and i'll cry as i confess to you because you'll hurt more than i'll ever know, and you'll walk away and i'll be alone,
                                        lonely,
                                                without you
                                      and the future we'll never know.

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