By Misti Velvet Rainwater
Date: 7 January 2000

Oh, the Horror!

Love...as I know it...as I
have learned it
on the street corner
waiting for a John
on the sidewalk
standing in line
waiting for a
hand-out
some Spam
for the cupboard
some milk for
the fridge...
is joyless and confined
to social niceties
Have a Nice Day!
(you bitch)
(muttered loud enough)
(for me to think)
(I'm paranoid)
and a roll of the dice
and a wink from
Venus and a nod
from the blue moon
fat and apathetic
and impossibly
unattainable
...in my primer
it says,"See love come"
           "See love go"
            "See love fall
                  down
             and go BOOM!"
...it's an easy read
but I keep forgetting the
lessons & the rules
I keep staying inside
while all the other little girls
are outside on the playground
sitting pretty on the 
merry-go-round
while the little boys
do all the work
...over and over all over 
the chalk board I write
I WILL NOT FALL IN LOVE!
I WILL NOT FALL IN LOVE!
and the principal
calls my parents
and I sit in my room
and listen to angry
music that says
Love is Stupid!
Love is Lame!
Love is for Fools!
Love is a game
that will never end
and it's no fun
so who cares
if you win?
...really, though,
I'm wondering
what's the deal?
was I born two signs
away from 
romantic success
and dumb luck
and a glittering tiara
and a Girl-Next-Door Throne?
this is puzzling
this is wasted effort
I'm tired of screaming
my truth into the wind
and acting as my own
PR agent
I'm tired of dancing
in these red shoes
and begging
applause
...there is something to 
be said for refusing
to tone down your
tacky colors
and stifle your
screeching voice
there is something to
be said for being
a Party of One...