By AML <hello739@msn.com>
Date: 8 December 1999

Severance

I am supposed to let go now
turn around and walk away from the past year and a half
as if it never existed, or at least find peace
to help me along I write you mean letters
letters I will never send
letters I don't really mean, but I gotta do whatever it takes...

I can't help but wonder why it was so easy for you 

after all the things we shared
all the things we did 
all the nights we loved
how vulnerable you were with me, and I with you
how soon you forget I held your trembling heart in my hands,
how soon you forget I kissed away your tears and made you feel safe to love again
I made you feel safe and you left me alone...

people give me advice, they say you got scared
they say you don't love yourself so how could you love me?
they say it's best, a gift from God in disguise
maybe I was not really happy with you anyway or
maybe I am just afraid of failing again

but what if I didn't fail?
what if it really is you.

it would be incredibly romantic if you were scared and you ran and ran and then ran all the way back to me to say you made a mistake,
you want me, you need me, as much as I feel I need you.

but feelings aren't always right and severance doesn't leave any hope behind

it leaves jagged bleeding edges that turn raw and so painful as they try to do whats right and heal.

Is a scar supposed to make me feel better? 

I guess I just better let go.

December 8, 99