By Paul B
Date: 12 June 2000

The first time I really Loved

The first time I really

LOVED.

I believed in love at first sight, instantly,
because of you.  I wasn't embarrassed by it and wanted to show the world we
were now
US.

I learned about a new found emotion, jealousy.
When I saw other men stealing glimpes of what I considered mine,
I tried to bury myself inside your soul, making love,
as if I was attempting to hammer you into two pieces or
roll an imaginary odometer.

I discovered I wasn't ready for real love,
I was immature and lacked confidence
that you could love me, even when you said you did.
So I left, in an attempt to beat you to the punch,
determined that a goddess could never be happy with a mere mortal.

I will forever question, did I do the right thing?
Did I save myself from you
or did I accidently save you
from me?

Either way, I learned how to love.
And all the others since you have benefited
dispite me exploring for a small piece
of you
in them.
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