By Crystal
Date: 4 September 2000
Feelings
Love is a funny thing,
It can bring happiness and pain,
Energy and depression,
Both smiles and tears,
It’s endures suffering and anger.
When Love is tried and tried again,
And never seems to win,
It never gives up,
It fights until the end.
The end…another funny word,
Finished, done with, over.
Yet, it always resorts in a new beginning.
I sit here, drained emotionally,
You were the subject of so many poems,
That you never even deserved to read,
Yet, this one somehow, I think you do.
And that is why I’m writing this.
You deserve to hear the words,
That linger in my mind,
That won’t fall from my lips.
It’s very hard to describe,
What I’m feeling right now,
It’s almost as if I’ve become emotionless,
Just as you have been always.
I’m trying to understand
Why you lie,
Why you hurt me so,
Is it for pure enjoyment,
Does it make you a larger man,
To say things untrue?
To rip my heart out with your bare hands?
To make me stop believing in everything I’ve learned
In the past 25 years.
That Love is strong…you weaken me.
Love is worth the waiting for…it wasn’t.
When you give someone your all…your life is better.
There is a God above to take care of you…he let you send me to hell.
When you do something great…someone is there to appreciate it.
Friends never say bad things about you, only to you to help with the truth you cannot see.
One day, it may be years down the road,
You’ll open that little shoebox of warm memories with me, to only find a stir of cold air run through your fingers.
Until then you won’t realize,
The wrong things you did,
You won’t remember the awful words you spoke,
And you will remember every moment you hurt me.
And you will cry a million tears,
But it will sadden you even more when you realize I’ve cried a million and one.
You won’t cry because you hurt me,
You’ll cry because you will see the kind of person you were…
And you will hate yourself for it…
If it’s any consolation, I will too!
And at that very moment,
I may be a thousand miles away,
But, We will have shared something.
Because that is when we both will shed a tear,
And not even know why,
For the memories we have,
or for those we have pushed far into the mind,praying they are forgotten.
It will be then that I forgive you!
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