By Susannah
Date: 10 September 2000
From Me to Him
My response to his letter....
I read the words
That you wrote to me
For through my eyes
A different man I see
The first line you wrote
honestly, made me smile
I just stared at it
And thought of "us" for awhile
Suddenly giggles came over me
On what I read next
Never doubt it Baby
Our sex was the best
Continue reading
I came to a part
And seeing those words
Tore at my heart
"many against us" all the time
They just didn't care
They were part of the problem
That, I do swear
Do you know how it felt
To be treated that way?
If I didn't love and adore you
why the hell would I have stayed
I did the things
you wanted be too
I bit my lip
Because of love for you
I will never do
that again you see
'Cause Baby
I have more respect for me
They hated me
Right from the start
Being kind and loving to them
Would never change that part
They don't have to worry
Not in this life
waiting for that dreadful day
cursing, you made me your wife
Maybe that's why
we never exchanged "I do's"
Maybe my tears
Was because of them too
Now jumping down
To a happier line
I still think of us
Those happier times
Now let me get
Back to your letter
To the moments we shared
When things were better
So many things in it
touched my heart
It's times like this
I hate being apart
I want to tell you
What shocks me the most
Is that I would have melted
Had you spoke like you wrote
You being this way
Is what I was dying to hear
And I hear it now
After 15 years
See, How something so simple
Can make my heart sing
Feeling so happy
Like when you gave me a diamond ring
when I asked for these things
I heard you repeat
A man being this way
Made him a geek and just weak
So I thought
Thats how you felt
So I let go of the words
That could make my heart melt
And then I let go
Of "fairytales" too
'Cause I heard you say
Only "little girls" do
Then soon after I left
I started to write
It helped to get through
and sleep at night
you write...
"You have done all you could, so why should you stay?"
"If I begged and pleaded, would that make it ok?"
Sitting here, now on my own
Tears start to flow
Is this how you feel?
God, I need to know
As I wrote you before
Not that long ago
I missed being with you
but I needed to grow
Why the nights you went out
And left me alone
I felt so rejected
No love for me shown
I must have been 30
when we stopped going out
hmmm..Did that plant the seed
or cast all this doubt?
Another thing came to mind
"She" would have been 18 at that time.
I apologize for that remark
"she" has nothing to do
With this scar on my heart
I have total confidence you see
and no other woman...has a body like me
Know this much is true
Never a moment has past
Honey
That I don't think of you.
*kissssssss*
So let me kiss you
As you rest your head
Thank you.. from my heart
For the loving words you said
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