By Me aka Niki
Date: 12 March 2001
At dinner table
I sat across him at the dinner table
Eating silently
Not saying much
Maybe even with red eyes
And when I looked up
I saw that he had been looking at me
He looked away when I caught him
Later on
I caught him again
But this time he didn't look away
I looked for a few seconds
And then looked away
Looked again and looked away
I acted as if I didn't really notice
Or that I didn't care
But the truth is
I was scared to fall into his eyes
Because I know if I look long enough
I'll forget everything around me
And I don't want to become weak and vulnerable
I don't want him to see my pain and longing
I don't want to see the sparkle in those black eyes
I became so used to seeing
I don't want to remember
I don't want to go back
Back to the Heart-on-Sleeve Corner