By Smiling Kat
Date: 15 March 2001

My Wish List

I thought I'd found the 
answer to my dreams.
Literally.
I even told him about it.
I told him I wanted to
get to know him better.
And I really meant it.
I told him I'd always be there for him,
And I still mean it.
I never give up on my friends.
We started spending time together.
It started to feel right.
Then something went wrong.
I realized that he'd never called me.
He never took any initiative.
I wrote it off as shyness,
Or maybe insecurity.
But then he started slipping away,
Showing up less and less,
Talking to me only when I talked to him,
With him not really being there.
I started to doubt myself.
Was it something I said?
Was there something I did?
No.
I give my friends all of my heart.
Maybe I give too much.
Maybe I am too honest.
But I'm not going to change.
There is someone out there who deserves me.
Who will love me for who I am.
And what I have become.
My life has been a journey,
And I've always been alone.
Friends would come and go,
Without ever really knowing me.
But things have changed.
I have changed.
I want someone who will accept me,
Respect me,
Be honest with me,
Hold me,
Talk to me,
Listen to me,
Care for me,
Be there for me,
And love me.
And I'll reciprocate in full.
Is that too much to ask?