By me aka niki
Date: 18 January 2001
A love letter
To you,
Here I am writting, a letter to you
Because In the end, I feel that all the love poems I write
are meaningles If I don't write my poems to you
So tell me, how are you?
Because My dear love it has been 5 months since I last saw the guy I thought I knew
After that you became A stranger to me
How is your girlfriend?
I see that the both of you are happy with each other
I saw it in your eyes, they were laughing
You looked like that once with me, a long time ago, she must make you happy
I'm happy for you
But Did you forget about me allready?
I need you to explain to me why you left me without even saying goodbye?
You left me alone and I was scared
Where were you?
I searched everywhere, and I couldn't find you
I found pieces of you, everywhere around me
I heard your name and voice and I saw your face in my mind
And when I did see you it wasn't the same, it wasn't the guy I knew and loved
When We sat next to each other, we sat in silence
As if Nothing ever happend, anyone that would see us would think that we were only strangers to each other
It's sad isn't it?
That after all this time all we are to each other is strangers
And There were times When I really needed you
When everything was just to much for me, the pressure was just sucking me down
As If I was falling in quicksand, In the end I didn't even try to get out
I just Did nothing and Turned my back on the world
Where were you?
I hated you once
I hated you for the pain you had inflicted on me
I hated you because you didn't care
And You only played games with me
How could you lie like that?
Explain to me how you could look in my eyes and just tell a lie without blinking or any emotion, as cold as ice
How could you just let me slip away like sand thru your hands without even trying to reach me?
You sure didn't waste anytime reaching out to her
I hope you Think of me when you kiss her
And that You see my eyes looking at you
I hope I haunt you
Not only Because I hate you for the the things you did
But also Because I love you and want to be there where you are, always
And I miss you
I miss you like hell
There were nights when I just cried myself to sleep
Or Just Fall to the ground in sobs because I thought about you
So much anger, when I thought about what you did
And I became so weak when I thought about the nice things you did
That last night, It felt so real
Do you know what I mean? didn't you feel it?
I thought That I had finally reached you
That we were going to be Allright
I guess I was so wrong
I always Felt when it wasn't going to work
And I was always right
But this time I thought that we had made it
I felt special Just like you said I was
But You must say that to every girl
So Just remember this
I cared so much
I cried so many tears because of you
I only thought of you
And I hope that your happy with her
I guess I lacked something, I wasn't enough
Or it was just not meant to be
I'm going to be just fine, don't you worry
I still miss you sometimes
And Will always love you
Love always,
Me
P.s Don't forget me...
Back to the Heart-on-Sleeve Corner