By Ali
Date: 21 December 2000
What I Wanted To Hear
After everything else
Has fallen apart
After my world has been broken
Into peices
And been carried away by the wind
Why do I find myself
Looking back
Always looking back
Glancing over my shoulder
Peering at yesterday
Or was it last month?
Who knows...
It's hard to see
Through all this pain
But, the tears don't help, either
I'm managing, don't you worry
Your pretty little head
I've still got
These words inside of me
That struggle to burst forth
Into semi-coherent sentences
And, no I didn't care
When you weren't around
Well, maybe I cared a little
Alright, who I am trying to fool
I missed you terribly
Didn't we have
This conversation
Already?
It seems oddly familar
Doesn't matter
I'm sure you didn't listen
The first time
I just can't figure myself out
After all that happened
After all you put me through
The torture
The confusion
The dissapointment
The depair
Everything
Every god-damned emotion
That you evoked
Within me
After that roller-coaster ride
Straight from hell and back
Why do I find
That I can forgive you?
That I still love you?
That I still want you?
Why is it that I
Believe you
When you say you're sorry?
Hell, it's the first time
"I'm sorry"
Has ever passed your lips
And I listened to your explanation
Found it impossible
To challenge
Was it because your explanation
Was logical, heartfelt and true?
Or was it because you told me
Just what I wanted to hear?
Back to the Heart-on-Sleeve Corner