By Cee
Date: 27 February 2001

Bitter Love

When i think of you it makes me want to scream , coz i don't understand how a blackened heart can rest in gentle hands . You fool my mind with all that you are , and i hate theses thoughts of caring so much . Coz caring leads to hurt , and hurt leads to bitterness , bitterness leaving me empty , back right where i started . I've heard time and time again that's it better to have loved and lost then to never have loved at all . This i think is bullshit , and whoever thought up this brilliant idea has never lost love . What's so good bout loosin'' love huh ? does that little saying make it all better , make you warm and cozy inside again ? I think not !!!....

When i think of you it makes me want to stab a fork into my eye , turning though's pitiful tears into blood , for i know your out of my reach , out of my league , so far from my touch . Coz i know we are not one in the same , if anything we are two totally different people , and i feel , i know that there is no one in this world for me . No one holds the same truths as me , or can make me feel complete , Coz there nothing in me to complete . How do you mend a broken soul , or does the soul just stay broken for a lifetime ......

When i think of you it makes me laugh , it makes me want to cry , I hate this feeling of not being in control of my emotions . Feeling like your all i want , knowing i can never have it . Knowing that you make me smile on my lowest of days , and feeling like i cant tell you all that i am . How do you tell someone you barely know how strongly you care for them ? Is there a way to break away from the ropes that bind you from your own personal happiness , some way to get past all you know and move on to the next life , the new life ?