By teri
Date: 10 February 2001

what could have been

there had already been too much between them. 
commitment was the last thing they needed. 
and yet... perhaps...but no. 
it wasn't meant to be. so they went around the matter, afraid to touch upon it. 
the days flew by, each day surpassing the one before it. for the first time, they held the hinted promise of a dream neither had been aware they wished for.

but finally, the day had to come. without speaking, he lifted her hand, kissing her palm but once. he looked only forward, though some say he was a coward for doing so. if he looked back...
would he have stayed?
years later, he would come to ask himself. 
but for the time, he turned, and with pride if not heart intact, walked out the door. she did the same. without a backward glance, she clutched one hand to her breaking heart and with the other, resolutely pushed and calmly closed behind her the heavy door. as he walked to his car, she walked to her room. as he started the engine she began to cry. 
tears of sorrow, pain, loss.. all intermingled, as the unceasing rain pellets fell unforgivingly to the ground behind the glass.
as her tears began to blind her vision, all became mixed as one with the storm raging also outside. touching a single finger to the icy window which barred her from what could have been, she whispered what she had been hiding so carefully from herself. 'i love you...'

driving away, he let himself formulate the words he had been afraid to admit to himself. he whispered back... 'i love you'