By Elaina
Date: 3 February 2001

Your Company

Happy, calm,
composed until
you walk in the
door. I don't
know what to say
so I say nothing.
I pretend I don't
see you and that you
can't see me, and
I pray when you
walk by that'll
you'll sit for a
while. Even though
it hurts, even though
I want to crawl
up and die everytime
you walk away. I can't
escape you. I
see when you look
at me, the fear I've
tried to hide. I just
let everything be
ok, and I'm dying inside.
I know you don't
want to hear this
and you don't have to
believe a word of
it, but I do have you
figured out, maybe
not completely, but
enough to know the
turth. Last night
I couldn't sleep,
I think because
I didn't talk to you
and today I couldn't
talk to you and I
have no idea what you
were trying to prove.
All I know is I was
scared to let you
see that I was upset,
you did nothing wrong.
It was me. And who
I am. So I put on this
facade that everyone
seems to enjoy
better, than the
real teary eyed me.
So I suppose now
I've again become
what I hate.
All I know is
everything will be
ok untill you
walk in the room.

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