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By Galadrial Date: 2001 Nov 08 Comment on this Work [[2001.11.08.09.19.10052]] |
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Sixteen is so d*mned tender, just barely formed and when they talked about free love, I heard the love part focused and tried to figure how to be a cool chick, not a drag, and thought that meant I would be free to love but that meant that they could look in my eyes and say "this doesn't mean anything you know", "this is just fun" "You're not gonna get heavy about this" or simply "don't get too comfortable, I'm not planning on remembering you." Now it wasn't that I thought I was this precious treasure--- but it hurt to hear words that hard from a mouth about to kiss me--- purely a technicality to be gotten out of the way before the GOOD STUFF could start. Don't make yourself at home. Don't go thinking you're special... until those acid words etched the glass of my soul and became a mantra i muttered that told me love wasn't gonna happen because the guys thought it was a game, and the cost of a kiss or wanting to be held and touched was selling yourself short at 16, 17, 18.... and the life cost was that you never feel at home enough to count love as real when there have never been arms that said "you're here." |