Ryan

By VelvetGoldmine
Date: 2001 Dec 21
Comment on this Work
[[2001.12.21.06.14.20204]]

Ryan Sept 8, 1998 The alarm buzzed loudly next to Ryan's ear, jolting him out of sleep. Groaning, Ryan rolled over onto his side and squinted at the clock. "Fuck." The first day of school had begun. Ryan sat up in bed and opened his eyes. Looking around, he chose a pair of day old jeans lying on the floor next to his computer to put on. He stood and shucked off his jockeys and walked naked to his dresser. The fifteen year old pulled open a drawer and took out a fresh pair of briefs and slipped them on. Sliding his jeans on, he walked out to the bathroom and brushed his teeth. "Ryan, are you awake yet?" his mom called. "Yea mom. Just woke up." "Well hurry up." "I am." Ryan walked back into his room and pulled a white t-shirt out of his closet and put it on. Walking in to the kitchen, Ryan grabbed a box of shredded wheat from the top of the refrigerator. "Ryan, you're not going to wear that, are you?" "Yep." Ryan crumbled the biscuits in their package and dumped the crumbs into a bowl. "It's the first day of school. I just bought you new clothes. Why don't you wear them?" Ryan poured milk on his cereal. "Mom, no one wears new clothes on the first day!" Rolling her eyes, Susan Brooks gave in. "Whatever makes you happy. Anyway, maybe this year, you'll find a nice girl to go out with. It's a new school, you never know." Ryan kept on eating. Near the end of his eighth grade year a few months before, he had told his mother that he was gay. This was her way of denying it. "Maybe you're right, mom." Susan beamed. "I might find a nice boy this year." Ryan smiled. "Ryan, this isn't healthy and you know it. You're only fifteen, you can't possibly know this for sure yet. When you're eighteen, we'll talk about it." He stood up angrily. "Dammit mom! How on EARTH can you say I don't know my own feelings? I don't dream about girls, I dream about GUYS! You can't control your dreams! And, why would I feel any different when I'm eighteen??" "It's just a phase honey. Calm down." "No I will not calm down! I wish you'd go online with me and see how many other people my age are out there who are gay." "I'm not going to argue with you. Look, your bus is rolling up. You'd better go." "You're right. I'd better go. Go before I say something I'll regret later." Ryan stood up and stormed out the door and walked up to the school bus. "Morning sonny." Ryan looked up at the driver, expecting to see an old man... who else would call him "sonny". Instead, he saw a man in his early thirties. "Sonny?" "Calm down. I was just joking." The man smiled. "Yeah, well I'm not in the mood." Ryan sat in the seat behind the driver. "Suit yourself. I'm John, by the way." John reached out and closed the door. Ryan was silent as the bus rolled down the street. "So, you're gonna be in the ninth grade?" John asked. "Yeah." "Best year of your life. You'll probably meet the girl who'll be your senior prom date this year." John grinned. "Yeah, sure." Ryan stared out the bus window. "How come there isn't anyone else on the bus?" "Cause you're the first stop on my route. Makes you kinda special." "Uhhuh I guess." "I guess you're not looking forward to a new school? You seem kinda bummed." "Naaa I like it. Just had a fight with my mom, that's all." "Oh? Let me guess. She wanted you to wear new clothes to school." "Yea, that's it. How'd you know?" "Well, cause you're wearing a t shirt, and jeans that look like they have a cum stain on the leg." Ryan glowed red in his embarrassment. He felt embarrassed because he didn't think that it would be visible, and because of this man's frank behavior. John continued, "Either you fell asleep in your jeans and had a wet dream, or you jacked through them." "You like talking to boys about cum?" Ryan got defensive. "Shit, it's just the way I am. I can't get embarrassed." John pointed at his head. "Birth defect. Some emotions I can't feel." "Oh." The bus rolled to a stop and a group of kids climbed on. "Hey John!!" "Hey Shawn, Andy, Sara, Amy, Michelle, Chris, Kyle." John turned and looked at Ryan. "I also never forget a name and face. What's your name?" "Ryan." A girl climbed on board, and Ryan heard John ask her if she was still bleeding heavy. "Yeah I am." She gave him a friendly punch on the shoulder and walked to the back of the bus. "Sheesh." Ryan muttered. He stared out the window until the bus stopped in front of Cleveland High School. He slid out of his seat and was about to get off the bus when a hand on his shoulder stopped him. He turned around, and asked John, "What?!" John whispered so no one else would hear, "Good luck finding a guy." Ryan stared at the bus driver, then hurried off the bus, shaken. How could this man, this STRANGER, possibly know that he was gay? Then remembering the stain, Ryan hurried into the building and looked for a bathroom to clean his jeans. Ryan slid into a desk in room 210, which was his homeroom just as the tardy bell rang. Mr. Crichton, a short black man, was standing in front of the blackboard, looking directly at Ryan. 'What, do I have cumstains on my face now?' Ryan thought. "Young man, in this class, We do NOT slink in ten seconds before the bell rings." Mr. Crichton raised his head and addressed the entire room. "Rule number one, you proceed directly from the school entrance to your locker, then directly here. Everyone will be seated QUIETLY before the bell rings." Ryan sighed. This year was going to suck. "Now, I will call roll, and when I call your name, you will respond with a 'here, Mr. Crichton'." "Ryan Brooks." 'Shit.' "Here, Mr. Crichton." "Mr. Brooks! Do you have a problem with pronouncing the letter 'T'? My name is not Mr. Cry-en, it is Mr. Cry-T-en." "Yes sir," Ryan answered meekly. "Yes sir, you have a problem, or yes sir you understand?" "Yes sir I understand." Ryan slouched in his seat to escape the teacher's glare. "And DO sit up straight." "Yes sir." Mr. Crichton continued with roll call, and Ryan noticed everyone stressed the T in his name. Twenty minutes later, the bell rang and Ryan hurried out of the classroom. Checking his schedule, Ryan began looking for room 101. His first class was pre-algebra. "What an asshole, huh?" a voice on his left asked. "Huh?" Ryan looked at the boy who was talking to him. It was Andy Garris, another one of Mr. Crichton's 'victims'. "Mr. Crichton. I think he's got a dick up his ass or something." "Hehe yea probably. I'm Ryan." "Duh, I know that. And so does the rest of homeroom." The slim blond looked at Ryan. "What's your first class?" "Pre-algebra. Ms. Magelssen." "Cool, me too. Any idea where it is?" "On the first floor." Ryan shrugged. "Duh, I know that. What school did you go to last year?" "Ellison. You?" "Oh, we kicked y'alls asses hehe. I was in King." "Cool. Football sucks anyway so I didn't care." Andy grinned. "Me neither." The two boys fought a crowd of students trying to go up the stairs as they tried to go down. Someone touched his butt as they pushed through the crowd. Finally, they got to the first floor, and Ryan looked around for Andy. "Right here Ryan." "Cool. Now, where do you think the room is at?" "No idea. Let's just walk around until we find it." "Yeah, that'll work I guess." Ryan chuckled. "What?" "Someone touched my ass when we were going down the stairs." Andy looked at Ryan. "Are you serious? Maybe it was an accident." "Nope. Whoever it was, they rubbed it." "Did you see who it was?" "Nope." Andy shrugged. "I guess someone thought you were cute or something." "Yea." Ryan looked at Andy, and found himself wishing that it was Andy that had done it. The boy was so cute. "How much do you weigh?" "Huh?" "You heard me, how much do you weigh?" "A hundred and ten pounds. How come?" Ryan shrugged. "Just wondering." "How about you?" "Same as you." "Cool." The two youths walked down the hall quietly. "Here it is." Andy said, pointing to a door just down the hall. "Cool." As they walked in, they saw each desk was labeled with each student's name. "Jesus Christ, what is this, elementary school?" Ryan muttered. "Yea, they seem to think so." Andy walked over to his desk, which was on the other side of the room and behind Ryan's. 'Fuck.' Ryan thought. 'Now I can't look at him.' The hour passed quickly, and the two boys met up at the end of the class to compare schedules. "Cool, we got one more class together, gym. See ya then." Andy said before he walked away. Ryan sighed. It was looking like John would be half-right. Ryan'd already found the boy he wanted, but of course, Andy would be straight. The rest of the day passed slowly, as Ryan anticipated seventh period... gym class. Finally, the last hour of the day arrived, and he rushed over to the gym. "Hey, where you goin so fast?" Andy's voice asked. Ryan stopped. "Hey dude!" he smiled. "Just headin to the gym." "Oh ok. Looked like you were, a, trying to avoid someone; or b, trying to hurry to see someone. Which was it?" "Umm..." Ryan gazed at the beautiful boy in front of him, and decided to take the chance. "It was B." "Oh really? Who were you wanting to see?" Ryan lost his courage. "Nobody really." "Okay." Walking into the gym, the pair sat on the bleachers and waited with the rest of the class for the teacher. Mr. Morgan came out of the office ten minutes after the bell rang. He was about six feet tall, and had a marine-style crew cut. "Oh shit." Andy whispered. "What?" "Hello students. My name is Mr. Morgan, and I'm your gym teacher for the next semester. I'm real easy to get along with unless you piss me off. I spent ten years in the Marine Corps, so don't think I'll accept any BS from any of you. "And, this may or may not come as a shock to you, but I require that you shower after class. No one leaves this gymnasium smelling like a horse. Other than that, there aren't too many rules I have." Ryan felt his penis stiffen at the thought of showering with other boys. He leaned forward and rested his elbows on his thighs to cover his erection. "Anyway, I'm not starting class until tomorrow, so the balls are up against the wall, so have fun." Mr. Morgan walked back into the office and sat at his desk. Andy poked Ryan. "He's cool." Andy grinned. "Yeah he is. First cool teacher I've seen in this school." Ryan sat up and looked over at the rack where the basketballs were. He didn't particularly feel like playing. Andy started snickering. "You've got a boner." Blushing, Ryan said, "Yeah, Leah is pretty good looking." Andy looked at the girl Ryan was pointing at. "Yeah, I'll give her that." Ryan was suddenly confused. Did this mean that Andy was gay? Why else would he be looking at his crotch? "Come on, let's play." Andy pulled at Ryan's shirt. "Naa I don't feel like it." "Suit yourself." Andy ran and joined a group at the nearest basket. Ryan watched Andy play. He never missed a shot, except when it was blocked. "Cute guy, huh?" a feminine voice asked. Without thinking, Ryan answered, "Yeah." Then he realized his blunder. "SHIT!" "It's ok, I won't tell anyone." Ryan turned around and saw who was speaking. It was Leah. "I'm Leah." "Hi. Ryan. Umm... how'd you, umm..." "Know that you liked him?" "Yeah..." "I didn't until you agreed with me. But it's ok. Like I said, I won't tell anybody." "Thanks. Am I that obvious?" "Not really. I just get feelings about certain things sometimes. Ninety-nine percent of the time, I'm right." Leah smiled. "You're pretty cute too." Ryan blushed. "Thanks." "Anytime." Leah swept her hair back. "I especially like your hair. You look good with long hair." "Yeah I like it too." "So, does anybody alse beside me know that you're gay?" "Yeah, my mom knows." "Cool. How'd she find out?" "I told her last year. She hates it. We even had an argument about it this morning." "Well that sucks. I'm sorry." "Naa don't be. You promise you won't tell?" Leah laughed. "Of course, silly! I like you." "Thanks." "Hey Ryan!" Ryan looked up, and saw Andy coming back. "You sure you don't wanna play?" "Yeah, I'm sure." "Okay." Andy sat down next to him. "I'm tired anyway. Hi." He looked at Leah. "Hi. I'm Leah." "Yeah, I know. Ryan here had a ..." Ryan punched Andy in the arm before he could say anything more. "Yeah I know." Leah giggled. "You boys are so weird like that." Ryan just shook his head. "This day is just too strange." he said. "Why you say that?" Andy asked. "No reason." The bell rang at that moment. School was over. "What bus do you guys ride?" Leah asked. "53." Ryan answered. "21." "Oh, ok. I'm on 24. See you guys tomorrow." With that, Leah got up and hurried out of the gym. Andy shoved Ryan playfully. "You lucky dog you." "Yeah, I am, huh?" "You know it. Hehe." "Yeah I do. By the way, where do ya live?" "On 23rd street. You?" "Over on 56th, near the mall." "Cool." Andy smiled. "I go there all the time. What house you live in?" Ryan thought about it, and answered, "Well, why don't ya get on my bus and come over?" "Your parents won't mind?" "Naa mom won't say anything. It's just me and her." "Oh. Where's your dad?" "He left mom when I was born." Andy felt bad for probing the subject. "Shit. I'm sorry." "It's ok. Doesn't bother me." "Ok. If you think she won't mind..." "Naa, c'mon, let's go before the buses leave." "Okay, but I gotta call my mom when we get to your house." "No problem." Ryan slammed his locker shut, and turned to Andy. "Ready?" "Yep." They walked out the door to the bus lot. A bus honked, and Andy pointed toward Ryan's bus. Andy's driver waved, and the bus pulled away. Before they got on the bus, Ryan turned to Andy and said, "By the way, dude, my driver is kinda... weird." "Weird?" "You'll see." "Ok." They boarded the bus, and John looked at Ryan and winked. "Told you so." Instead of sitting up front, Ryan led Andy to the back of the bus. "Told you what?" Andy asked. Ryan shrugged noncommittally. "Dunno. He's weird, I told you." The bus pulled away just then, and began backtracking the route to drop the kids off. Thirty minutes later, John stopped the bus in front of Ryan's house. They got off the bus, and John said, "See ya tomorrow Ryan. Good luck." 'What is with everybody knowing that I like guys??' Ryan thought. "Later dude." Looking at Andy, Ryan added, "This is my house, let's go in." "The bus stops in front of your house? COOL! I gotta walk three blocks to get to my bus stop. And that's gonna suck when it rains." "Yea, I bet it will." Ryan snickered. "I'm glad I don't gotta worry about that hehe." Andy punched Ryan in the shoulder. "Punk." Ryan slid his key in the lock and opened the front door. "Yea, but I'll be a dry punk. C'mon in. You hungry?" "Naa." "Too bad, cause I am." Andy followed Ryan into the kitchen where the slim youth began making a marshmallow creme and peanut butter sandwich. "Yuk. Marshmallow creme and peanut butter?" "What's wrong with that?" "Well, marshmallow creme looks like cum, for one," At that, Ryan licked the creme-covered knife. "Tastes fine to me. Why, does your cum taste like this?" Ryan offered the knife to his friend. "Gross dude." "Hehehe." Ryan took a bite out of his sandwich. "It's good. You sure you don't want any?" "What, marshmallow creme or cum?" Gazing at Andy, Ryan decided to take another chance. "What do YOU want?" he asked slowly. Andy didn't answer; he just stared at Ryan, then walked out of the kitchen. 'Shit shit shit shit.' Ryan thought. He was about to set his sandwich down and go after Andy when he heard the boy's voice. "Cool room dude." 'Fuck fuck fuck he's gonna see my poster!!' Ryan had a poster of Elijah Wood bare-chested from the movie Flipper hanging on his wall above his computer. "I see you like Elijah too." Ryan's jaw dropped. Did he hear that right? He hurried to his room. Andy was sitting on his bed looking around the room. "Did you um, just say that you like Elijah?" "Yep. He's a kewl actor." Disappointment set in. Andy wasn't attracted to Elijah, after all. "And he's cute." Andy added. Ryan heard his name being called. 'Jesus mom let me sleep!' he thought. Then he felt someone shaking his shoulder, so he opened his eyes. For an instant, he didn't know where he was... this wasn't the view from his bed, and he sat bolt upright. Then he realized he was on his floor and Andy was talking to him. "Are you ok? You just kinda fainted." "Yeah I'm fine." "Sure?" "Yep. I guess I was just..... amazed." "Why?" "Cause you said Elijah was cute. I never heard another guy say that bout a guy." Andy sat on the floor next to him. "Yea and I never woulda said it at all if Leah hadn't told me that you are interested in me." Ryan was puzzled... Leah couldn't have told him. "She did? When??" "Hahaha why do you think I came back from basketball? She nodded to me when I looked at her. That was her signal for me." "Huh??" Andy explained, "Me and Leah were in the same classes last year and we're real good friends. And, she's in my science class sixth period. I was telling her about you. She said you're in english with her and she hadda feeling about you. So she said she'd find out for me. And she did." "Ohhh. So, um, you like guys too then?" "Hellllll yeah I do. Guys are way better than girls anyway. Who in their right mind would put his dick in a furry cocktrap? You never know what might be living inside there." Andy's name for female anatomy sent Ryan into a fit of laughter. "Furry cocktrap!! Hahahahahahaha!!!" Andy smiled. "Yeah I think Elijah is cute, but he's nowhere near as cute as you are." Ryan couldn't help grinning. The day started out bad, continued weird, but it had just become the happiest day of his life. He finally calmed down enough to look at Andy without laughing. "So what do we do now?" Andy didn't answer. Instead, he leaned over and gave Ryan a quick kiss on the cheek. "I gotta call my mom." "Oh yeah that's right. Phone's on the computer desk." "You got your own phone?" "Yep. Present from my grandma. I'm just not allowed long distance." "Cool!" Andy picked up the handset and began punching numbers. "Hi mom. I'm at a friend's house so I'll be late tonight. No I don't have any homework. No. Yea I will. No. Ok. Love you too." He hung up. "I can stay until eight if I eat something. Otherwise I gotta be home by seven." "No problem dude." Ryan smiled. "So..." "What do you wanna do?" "Dunno. What do you wanna do?" "Wanna see my web page?" "Sure." Ryan got up and sat at his computer. A few minutes later, they were looking at his page. "Nice page." "Thanks. But it takes too long to load." "You don't have anything about being gay on it. How come?" "Cause most people who know about it think I'm straight." "Oh I see. Do you ever chat?" "Yea I do." "Where do you go?" "Irc4kids. How about you?" "I'm usually on gayteenboys. Irc4kids sucks. Why do you go there?" "Cause that's the first chat room I found when I got online last year." Andy punched Ryan in the shoulder. "Don't you ever go to gay chat rooms?" "Ow that's starting to hurt." "Sorry. Well, do you?" "Yea, I sometimes change my nick and go to gayboysex." "GBS? How come? You cyber there?" Ryan blushed. "Yea sometimes." "Cyber is lame, dude." "Don't tell me you've never done it." "I never did. I think it's lame, and you never know who you're talking to." Ryan simply shrugged. "I don't really care if someone lies about their age to me. I never see them online again anyway." "Okay." "Would you cyber with me?" "No." "Why not? You're gay. I'm gay. You know me in real life..." "Exactly." "Huh?" Andy punched Ryan in the shoulder. "OW!" "Think about it, why would I cyber with you online, when I know you in real life and could do it for real? DUH!" "Oh." I didn't think of that. "Yea, sure you didn't." Andy grinned. "Okay, I mighta had one or two thoughts about it." Andy pushed Ryan off the chair and pinned him on the floor. "Yeah, what kinda thoughts?" he asked as he sat on Ryan, holding his hands against the floor. "Well..... I thought it might be cool if we um, you know... sucked each other." "Maybe." "Maybe?" "Yep. Maybe." "Why only maybe?" "Cause you might shoot in my mouth and I don't like that." "Oh. I wouldn't." "How do I know that?" "Cause I said." "And besides, I just met you. I won't do anything on the first date." Andy got up and grabbed his backpack. "I better go now." "Why? Did I do something wrong?" "No, but I have to leave so I can come back and start a second date, right?" At that, Andy walked out of the house. A couple minutes later, a stunned Ryan heard a knock on the door. He got up from the floor and answered it. "Hey Ryan." Ryan laughed. "Hi Andy. Come on in." "Thanks." Andy wrapped his arms around Ryan and kissed him gently on the lips. "Second date." They hurried to Ryan's room, and threw themselves on his bed. Kissing, the two boys reached for each other's zippers. Then Ryan heard the familiar growl of Susan's car. "Shit. Mom's home." Andy pulled himself off of Ryan, and the two boys sighed. "Wouldn't you know it?" "Yeah. I bet she knew somehow." Andy laughed. "Yeah probably hehe." "Ryan, can you help me please?" Susan called from the door. "Sure mom." turning to Andy, he said, "It's probably groceries. You wanna help?" "Yeah, why not." They walked outside, and Ryan introduced Andy. "New friend?" "Yep. Met him today." Susan eyed her son with suspicion. "Meet any nice girls?" "Actually, mom, I did. Her name's Leah." "Oh, Leah's a nice name," Susan said as she loaded Ryan up with bags. "I'll help, Mrs. Brooks." "Why, thank you Andy." They carried the bags into the kitchen, where Ryan and Susan began putting the groceries away. "Andy, I hate to sound rude, but I think it's time for you to go. You can see Ryan at school tomorrow. DO you need a ride home?" "No ma'am, I'm ok. See ya Ryan!" Andy headed out the door. Ryan stared at the door as it closed behind Andy. "MOM!! WHY DID YOU DO THAT?" "Don't shout at your mother, Ryan Blake Brooks. I don't want any boys here." "What?? Don't you trust me??" Ryan slammed a can on the counter. "RYAN! Don't piss me off, young man. Until you can show me that you can behave like a normal fifteen year old, no boys are allowed in this house." "But he's straight! He doesn't have ANY interest whatsoever in guys! He's just a friend I made today! Can't I have friends?" "Of course you can, sweety. You just can't bring them here." Seething, Ryan fought to control his temper. "Mom...you...are...an...ignorant...bitch!" Susan stood straight at hearing that, and began to sob. "Get out of my face... NOW!" "Fine, I will!" Ryan stormed into his room and locked the door. Lying down on his bed, Ryan fumed with anger. He couldn't believe his mother had just banned all boys from coming over.... just because he was gay! Taking a deep breath to calm down, Ryan closed his eyes... Sept 9, 1998 Ryan woke up; panicked... he was late for school! As he was climbing out of bed, he realized that it was dark. He took a look at his alarm clock: 1:04. Sighing, Ryan unlocked his door and walked When he finished, he tiptoed into the kitchen and opened the refrigerator. There was a saran-wrapped bowl with spaghetti and sauce. Remorse filled Ryan. He couldn't believe he'd said what he said. 'Oh well.' Ryan frowned. He shut the door and went back to his room. Ryan shucked off his clothes and crawled into bed. Laying on top of his covers, he thought about Andy, and felt a stirring. Since he wasn't tired, he figured he'd go ahead and take care of himself... that usually made him sleepy. He reached into his nightstand and pulled a well-used towel out and began. His alarm buzzed loudly in his ear. Ryan groaned, it couldn't be time to get up already. He got up and grabbed a towel and went into the shower. As he was soaping himself in the steaming shower, he thought about his mother. He loved her very much, but she could piss him off so much. "I don't understand her, " he said to himself. "Why can't she just accept who I am?" Tilting his head back, Ryan wet his long hair and reached for the pert. He carefully lathered his hair and rinsed it. He shut the shower off and pulled his towel off the doorknob and dried himself before stepping out of the tub. He felt good. "God I love hot showers." he said, wrapping the towel around his waist. Walking into the kitchen, Ryan made a bowl of shredded wheat and took it to his room. He sat at his computer desk and checked his email as he ate the cereal. He didn't have any, but since he still had some time, he figured he'd go ahead and check out one of his favorite galleries. "So how'd it go yesterday?" John asked as Ryan stepped on the bus. "I dunno what you mean." "Ok." Ryan walked to the back of the bus and stared out the window the entire trip to school. "Mr. Brooks. This is the second consecutive day you have come into my classroom late." "I'm not late, Mr. Crichton" he protested. "By my rules, you are. Now go sit at your desk." Mr. Crichton passed some sheets to the first desk in each row. "Take one and pass it back. This is a survey that the school district conducts at the beginning of each freshman year to get input on how middle school was. It's completely anonymous, so answer truthfully." He gave a hard look at Ryan. Over the next twenty minutes, the class filled out the three-page survey. There were questions on it ranging from teacher popularity to drugs. Ryan waited for Andy at the door. "Heya Andy." Ryan grinned. "Hey dude." "Man, you shoulda seen it." "What?" "Me and my mom had a big fight after you left." Andy frowned. "I don't wanna cause trouble." "You didn't. My mom was bein a total bitch." Ryan looked around quickly and whispered, "She doesn't want boys coming over anymore." "Man that sucks. You think you can come to my house then?" Ryan laughed. "Yeah right. She won't let me do that either I bet." "You're probably right." "I am." The two boys walked into room 101 and sat in their desks. The teacher wasn't in the room yet, so it was chaos. Twenty minutes later, Ms. Magellsen walked in. The tall woman stood in front of the class. "Sorry I'm late, but I had to take a phone call. My son thought that flushing his teacher's wig would be a funny joke." The class giggled. "Okay, so I see you kids do too. Anyway, open your books to the first chapter." For the next hour, she taught the basics of pre-algebra. When the bell finally rang, she said, "No homework today. Have a good day." Andy was waiting at the door for Ryan. "Too bad we don't have the same lunch, dude." "Yeah. See you in gym." "Oh shit I forgot my gym clothes." "Uh oh. Dumbass." Andy punched Ryan in the shoulder. "I'm not a dumbass, dumbass." Ryan grinned. "See you later." "Yeah, see ya." Ryan walked to his next class, which was just around the corner. "Hey Ryan!" a girl's voice called. Ryan turned around. "Hi Leah." "Hi." she grinned. "So, did he tell you?" "Tell me what?" Leaning close to his ear, Leah whispered, "That he likes you just like you like him." "Oh yeah, he did. But my mom told him he had to go home." Ryan whispered, "She doesn't want me to have any boys over." "That sucks." "Yeah." "Want to sit next to me today?" "Sure. You're pretty cool.... for a girl." "Haha. I'd punch you, but your shoulder is probably sore from Andy punching it. He has a habit of doing that, you know." "Don't I ever." Ryan rubbed his shoulder. The pair sat in desks that were next to each other. The teacher, Mr. Gill looked at them. "Is that where you two want to sit from now on?" Leah answered, "Yep." "All right, but the moment it becomes a distraction, I'm separating the two of you." Turning his attention to the class, he continued, "Why don't we start class by you telling us what you did over the summer? I'm not going to make you write it, because that's stupid." "It sure is," Leah whispered. "Yeah." Mr. Gill looked at a tall boy in front. "How about you, Paul?" "I didn't really do anything this summer." "You mean you did nothing?" "Pretty much." "Well, did you go swimming?" "Yeah I sure did." "Where? Did you go to a pool, a lake, ocean, river?" "Just the pool. Did a lot of practicing so I can join the swim team." "Ahhhh I see. You want to join the swim team then. What stroke do you do?" Ryan leaned to whisper to Leah, "Probably the skinflute stroke." She giggled. "That's disgusting." "Crawl." "Well, do you know when the swim season starts?" "Not really. I figured I'd ask my gym teacher." "It starts in November. I'm the coach." "Cool." Paul smiled. "How about you, Ryan?" "Huh?" Ryan asked. Leah jabbed him in his side. "What did you do this summer?" she whispered. "Oh yea. I just hung out at the mall mostly." "That's it?" "Pretty much." "Well, what did you do at the mall?" "Nothing much. Just hung out." "I see." Mr. Gill asked another student, Sara Black. She had gone to Europe to visit relatives, and she spent the rest of the hour talking about it. The bell rang, releasing the students. Ryan walked alone to his next class, science. The teacher sat at his desk the entire hour, working on papers, so no one did any work, just talked. The fourth hour crawled by. The only thing interesting that happened was when the teacher told a joke about viagra and the president. Ryan carried his tray and sat at a table alone. He picked up his hamburger and bit into it. "Hey stud. Anyone sitting here?" Ryan looked up. "Hi Leah." Leah sat down. "I think the two of you would make a cute couple," she said. Swallowing another bite of his burger, Ryan said, "Thanks. But I dunno how easy that would be." "Yeah, Andy told me you and your mom had a fight." "Yeah we did. I haven't seen her since last night. I guess she stayed in bed. I feel really bad about that." "What happened exactly?" "She kicked Andy out of the house and said I wasn't allowed to have anymore guys come over. She also said some other stupid shit that pissed me off. I called her a bitch." "I'm surprised she didn't kill you. I know I would if I was her." Ryan shrugged. "She never hits me." "I see." Leah looked at her food. "This food really bites." "It's ok." "Yeah, for you. You're not a vegetarian, I am." "How come? Meat is good." "I don't believe in eating animals." "Weird." Leah threw a pea at Ryan. "Don't call me weird." Ryan ducked. "Ack! Veggie attack!" Leah laughed. "You're funny." "Funny looking, maybe." "Yep." "HEY!" Leah stood up. "I'm gonna dump this food, then go to the library. See ya in gym." "Wait, I'll come with you." Ryan got up, the chair scraping noisily against the floor. The two strolled to the tray dump, then headed toward the library. "So, how long have you known that you're gay?" "I dunno really. I've always felt like this." "Yeah? Do you really think it's genetic?" Ryan held the door open for Leah, and they walked over to a table in the far corner. "It has to be, I mean, I never chose it. I didn't wake up one day, and think, 'I think I'm gonna look at guys and get boners about them and dream about them'. It just happens." "Yeah, you've got a point. I didn't choose to be straight, so I don't believe the bullshit that people like you choose to be gay." "That's what it is, all right, bullshit." "You told your mom?" "Yep." "Why? I mean, obviously its causing problems." "I dunno why. I guess I thought she'd be cool about it." "I'm sorry she's not." "Don't be." Ryan leaned back in the chair. "So how did you find out about Andy?" "I saw him staring at this one guy in class every day so I asked him." "Oh. Kinda like what happened yesterday?" "Pretty much. He likes you, you know." "Yeah I know." Ryan smiled. "My mom came home early yesterday. That was a disappointment. Hehe." "I'm not sure I wanna know this." Leah said, laughing. "I wouldn't kiss and tell anyway." "Good." The bell rang. "Shit. See ya in gym, Leah." "Yeah, see you later." Fifth and sixth periods went by uneventfully. Ryan opened the door to the locker room and walked to the back. Sitting on the bench, he dug out his sweat pants and a t-shirt. "Hi Ryan." "Oh, hey Andy." Ryan grinned. Andy pulled his shirt over his head, and Ryan stared at his friend's naked chest. "Whatcha doin after school?" Andy asked. Unbuttoning his pants and pulling them off, Ryan answered, "No idea. I'm probably gonna be grounded after what I said to mom yesterday." "Bummer." Andy put a sweatshirt on and pulled his jeans off. "I thought you didn't have any gym clothes today?" "I didn't but someone let me borrow his." "Oh cool." Ryan pulled his sweat pants on and changed shirts. "Yeah. If you don't get grounded, meet me at the mall, ok?" "Sure." Ryan waited for Andy to get his shoes back on, and they went into the gym. Mr. Morgan was shooting hoops with a few other students. "I'm gonna go play. Wanna come?" "Naa. I'll just sit on the bleachers." "Suit yourself." Andy took a position in front of Mr. Morgan and tried to steal the ball. "Hey dude, how come you don't play ball?" someone asked. "Cause I don't feel like it." "You'll look like a fag if you never play." "I don't care what other people think." "Fag." The boy got up and joined the growing group. Ryan watched Andy play. Andy really was very good. Andy spun to evade someone trying to steal the ball, and jumped and shot. The ball went in. Ryan imagined a whooshing sound as the ball fell through the net. Standing up, Ryan ran into the game. Andy saw him, and grinned. Then Andy passed the ball to him. Ryan dribbled it away from the others and shot at the hoop. It bounced off the rim into the hands of the opposing team. By the time the game ended, Andy's team had 10 points and the other team had 34. "That was an ass whipping." Andy commented as they sat on the bleachers to cool down. "I'm glad you decided to play. What made you change your mind?" "Dunno." Andy's knee pushed against Ryan's. "Doesn't matter, I guess. You wanna play a game of our own?" "Sure." "Cool." Andy ran to the ball rack and met Ryan at a goal. They faced off, and began playing. Andy was a lot better than Ryan, so he easily pulled ahead of Ryan in terms of points. They were so occupied playing that they almost didn't hear the teacher's whistle blow. "Hit the showers and go home." Ryan looked at the showers. There weren't any stalls for privacy. 'What if I get a boner?' he wondered. Andy snapped him with a towel. "Let's go." he said as he stepped under a showerhead. Ryan unwrapped the towel from his waist and stepped under his own showerhead. He stood under the water long enough to get his hair wet and to rinse the sweat from his body. Then he hurried back to the locker and got dressed. Waiting on the bleachers for Andy, Ryan saw Leah come out of the girls' locker room. "Hey Leah!" "Hey Ryan." she smiled and walked over. "I watched you play basketball with Andy." "Yeah, he's good." "You bet I am." Andy said, startling Ryan. "Only in your mind." he retorted. Leah picked up her book bag. "I'm goin to my bus. You two coming?" "I gotta go to my locker first." Ryan said. "Yeah, me too." "Ok. See you two tomorrow then." "Yeah, see ya." Ryan and Andy fought the crowd to their lockers. "Where in the mall do you wanna meet?" "How about mickey d's?" "Ok." Ryan smiled at Andy. "We can talk better there. I'll be there at five o'clock if I'm not grounded." "Kewl." Ryan's mother was waiting for him when he got home. "I want to talk to you." "Ok." 'Here it comes.' "Your behavior last night was inexcusable, and I still stand by what I said." "But it's not fair mom." "What's not fair? Me trying to make sure that you turn out normal?" Ryan laughed. "Normal? What's normal?" "A man and a woman. Not a man and a man, and you know it. I really wish you'd open your eyes and see what a destructive lifestyle this is you've chosen." "I didn't choose it. It's the way I am." Susan looked her son. "You weren't abused, were you? If you were, you can tell me." "No mom, I wasn't abused! I was BORN gay." "I find that hard to believe." "Why? What's so hard to believe about it? You're straight right?" "Of course I am." "You were born straight right?" Susan stood. "It's obvious to me that you're not ready to discuss this yet. Go do whatever it is you do." "What does that mean?" "Go outside, go online, read, whatever it is you do. I obviously don't know you anymore." Ryan turned his back. "I guess you don't. I'm going to the mall." He went into his room and dropped his book bag on his bed, and walked out the door. Sept 9, 1998, The Mall Riding his bike down the street, Ryan was fuming. Lately he'd begun to regret ever telling his mother about his being gay.... they were having more arguments than they'd ever had. But, he just couldn't understand what her problem was. It just amazed him how thickheaded she was about this. "Damn hypocrite." he said to himself. "All my life she teaches me not to hate people and what does she do? Acts like I don't know myself." The wind began to pick up, so he pedaled harder. "And I HATE riding my bike in the wind!" he complained. He reached the top of the hill leading into the parking lot, and pulled to a stop. He looked down to make sure there wasn't any traffic, and pedaled hard. Looking at his speedometer, he watched the needle climb to thirty miles an hour before he stopped pedaling and let his momentum carry him to the bike rack. He was nearly at a dead stop when he reached it, so he hopped off and leaned his bike against the side of the rack and locked the frame to it. Walking into the mall, Ryan spotted a bill on the floor and he walked over to pick it up. Looking at it, he saw it was a twenty, and he quickly stuffed it in his pocket. Ryan hurried away and stepped into a bookstore to read some magazines. He looked through the gaming magazines to see if there were any good games coming out. After about thirty minutes of looking through the magazines and not finding anything interesting, Ryan gave up and headed toward McDonald's. He stood in front of the counter and stared at the menu, trying to decide what to eat. "May I help you?" the cashier asked. "I'm still deciding." Ryan replied. 'Why do they always try to get you to order before you're ready?' he wondered. A couple minutes later, he made his decision, and stepped up to the counter. Still looking at the menu, Ryan gave his order to the lady. "Medium coke, two large fries, big mac, and an apple pie please." She punched in his order and gave him the price. After paying, Ryan waited at the end of the counter for his meal. "Hey dude." Ryan turned around. It was Andy. "Hey!" Ryan grinned. "You order anything?" "Yeah, an hour ago. Glad you're not grounded." "So am I. We had another fight today." Andy sighed. "Things aren't too good right now are they?" "Things are ok. She's just being weird." "Number 32." said one of the employees. Ryan handed his ticket to the worker and took his tray. The two boys walked over to a table and sat down. "Anyway, what you been doin here?" "I was playin MK4. Got my ass kicked, as usual." Andy grinned. "Hahaha. Yeah I know what you mean. Version two is harder than the first one. I could beat the first one but I'm lucky if I get past Raiden now." "The secret to Raiden is you gotta keep him off his feet. SubZero is the best one to use against him cause of his slide attack. Slide, jump and kick. Do that and you'll beat him." "Yeah I know." Ryan smiled at Andy. "SubZero is my favorite character. How bout you? Who's your favorite?" "SubZero too." Ryan lifted the coke to his mouth and took a drink. "Cool. You wanna play after I'm done eating?" "Sure, but I don't got anymore money." "That's all right, I got plenty." "Ok." Andy reached over and grabbed some fries from the tray. "I like Burger King fries better." "Me too, but the mall don't have Burger King." "I know. Their pies are better too." Andy reached for his friend's pie. "Touch that and die." Ryan said. Snickering, Andy replied, "How am I gonna die?" "Oh I'll find a way... maybe choke you. Hehehe." "Don't threaten me with a good time, boy." Ryan set his coke down to avoid spilling it when he laughed. "That was pretty good." "Yeah I know." Andy ate some more of the fries. A few minutes later, the food was gone, so the two got up and walked toward the arcade. "Damn, now we'll never get to play." "Well we can watch." "Yeah I guess." Ryan positioned himself so he could look between two people and see the screen. One player was using Raiden and the other was playing with Liu Kang. The Liu Kang player did the bicycle kick, but Raiden blocked him, and gave him and uppercut. Raiden jumped after Liu Kang, and began to annihilate him. When round two started, the man playing Liu Kang shook his wrists and went after Raiden. This time Liu Kang killed Raiden, and the match was 1 to 1, so there would be a third round. "Who do you think is gonna win?" "Dunno Andy, they're both pretty good." "I think Raiden will." They watched the game. Liu Kang shot fireballs at Raiden, who blocked them easily. Raiden then did his flying attack, but Liu Kang used the opportunity, and performed a roundhouse kick. Liu Kang moved in and killed Raiden. "Wow that was fast." "Yeah. Wanna play against him." "Naa, I think I'll save my money. Let's play jurassic park." "Ok." They turned around and walked over to The Lost World and climbed inside the booth. Andy picked up a gun and aimed it at the screen while Ryan dropped eight quarters in. "Damn this game is expensive. You better not get killed too fast." "Hahaha I'll try not to." Ryan picked up his gun, and waited for the game to begin. They made it through ten minutes of the game before Ryan got killed. He put four more quarters to continue the game. Ten minutes later, Ryan was killed again. He gave up and sat back to watch Andy play. Andy was good... he only received one injury before fighting the chameleon tyrannosaur. "Put some more quarters in Ryan, I always get killed at this part." "Ok but I gotta go to the change machine. Don't get killed." "Geeeez thanks." Ryan climbed out of the booth and hurried to the change machine. There was a line of three people waiting to use it. 'Damn' he thought. Finally his turn at the machine came up, and he put the dollar in and swiped the quarters out of the tray when they fell. Andy was waiting inside the booth. "Hurry, it's counting down." Ryan reached for the coin slot to put the quarter in before the continue count down ran out, but he was too late. "Shit. Sorry about that." "Oh well. I always die there anyway." Andy looked over at the Mortal Kombat game, there was an even larger crowd there now than before."Still wanna play?" "Hell yeah I do." Ryan climbed out of the booth and walked around to Andy's side and pulled him out by the arm. "Let's go." They headed toward the MK game, and watched the same person who'd been playing with Liu Kang use SubZero against another challenger. "Finish him!" the game said. He tried to perform a fatality, but only wound up freezing his challenger. "Damn I can't ever get that right." he cursed. "Who the fuck cares Gabe. You kicked my ass. As usual." "That's cause you're a pansy ass faggot who can't play." "Fuck you." Andy and Ryan looked at each other. "On second thought, why don't we go catch a movie, or something?" "Let's go to the pool. I don't feel like seein any movies tonight." "Why not, Ry?" Ryan shrugged. "Dunno. Just not in the mood." "Ok but I don't got a swimsuit." "Me neither. I didn't say go swimming, I just said, 'lets go to the pool'." Ryan grinned. "Ohhhh. I get it!" Andy smiled. "Yeah, let's go." Ryan grabbed Andy's arm and pulled him to the door through which he'd come in. "You like pulling on me, don't u?" "Just your arm." "Uhhuh sure. We'll have to change that sometime soon." Andy reached over and tickled Ryan's side. He twisted away from Andy's hand and ran to the door. "Where do you think you're going?" Andy laughed. Chasing his friend, Andy caught up to Ryan as the shorter boy was unlocking his bike. "Gotcha!" "Hahaha." Ryan looked around, and saw no one in sight, so he leaned forward and kissed Andy. "Ya know what?" Gazing into Ryan's soft brown eyes, Andy asked, "What?" "I think I'm falling in love with you." At that, Ryan hopped on his bike and waited for Andy to unlock his. "Me too." "Kinda conceited, aren't you? Falling in love with yourself?" Andy punched Ryan in the shoulder. "Not myself, silly!" Grinning, Ryan retorted, "I know that. Just messin wit' ya." Andy swung his leg over the bike frame and began pedaling away. "I know that too. Race ya!" "You're on!" Ryan sped up and kept even with Andy as they pedaled through the parking lot. Andy headed straight for the hill, but Ryan turned and hopped the bike up onto the sidewalk to go up the hill. Looking down the slope as he rode up the street, Ryan saw Andy hop off his bike and run it up the hill. Ryan pumped his legs harder and reached the top of the hill at the same time as Andy. "Beat you up!" "Did not!" Andy shoved off and veered toward a field. Ryan followed, crossing the street without looking for traffic. A car blared its horn, and its brakes squealed against the asphalt. The driver stepped out of the car and hollered, "Hey kid! Watch where you're going next time, I almost hit your stupid ass!" Without looking behind, Ryan flipped the man off and hurried after Andy, who was already nearing the pool. Andy turned around, and began slowing down. "What was all that about?" "Oh nothing," Ryan dismissed the incident with a shrug. "Ok." Andy pulled up to the fence and placed his hand against the chain links to support himself as he looked through. "He's kinda cute," he said, pointing at a kid their age. Ryan looked at the boy. "Yeah, he is. I like his speedoes, hehe." "Shit yeah. You think they're tight enough?" Andy reached down and squeezed himself. Nodding, Ryan replied, "Yep. He should take them off." Andy laughed. "Yeah, you're right, he should." They watched for a few more minutes, then walked away to avoid attracting attention. The couple headed toward a playground in the park, and sat on the swings. "Where's your accent from, Andy?" "Tennessee. We moved here a couple years ago to get away from my step-dad." "Oh I didn't think your parents were divorced." "They were, but they got back together last year." "Wow that's cool. I bet you were happy." Ryan smiled. Looking at his feet, Andy answered, "Yea I sure was. Mike was an asshole. Mom and Dad can't believe they'd been divorced." "Do they know about you?" "Hell no. I don't know how I could tell them. I think it would be ok with them though." "I hope so. It really sucks that my mom knows." "Yeah, sounds like it." Andy swung over and wrapped his legs around the pole and hung on. "At least she was polite about kicking me out of the house last night." "Yeah, well she shouldn't have done that. We been fighting a lot lately and I got no clue why." "Who knows. Hey, wanna come to my house?" Ryan swung over to where Andy was hanging, and grabbed him to pull him off. "Of course." he said, smiling. "Well then, let's go!" Andy twisted away from Ryan's probing fingers and picked his bike up. Sept 9, 1998, Andy's House "Hi mom!" Andy called as he and Ryan walked into his house. "I got a friend with me. Is it ok if he comes in?" Andys mother, a short, plump woman with gentle features stepped out of the kitchen to see Ryan. "Hello, I'm Andy's mother," she said in a sweet voice. Ryan held out his hand. "I'm Ryan. Nice to meet you, Mrs. Garris." Mrs. Garris smiled. "Call me Lorene. Come on in, I'm making brownies." She stepped away from the door to let Ryan in, and headed back into the kitchen. Leaning toward Andy, Ryan whispered, "Is your mom for real? It's like she's outta the fifties." Chuckling, Andy whispered back, "She's really nice... but she doesn't usually bake anything. She likes to go out and buy Sara Lee better." "God. I can't believe it though, it's like she's out of some story or something." Andy poked Ryan in the ribs. "Hey, she's no story character, she's as real as you and me are." "I know that. I like her already, I'm just surprised." "Ahh shut up, let's get some brownies." The two boys walked into the kitchen, where Lorene was putting a tray of brownies into the oven. "Andy, would you call your father and find out when he's getting off work?" "Sure, mom." Andy picked up the phone next to the kitchen table and pressed the speed dial for his father's work. Turning to Ryan, Lorene said, "Help yourself to a brownie. I made about fifty of them, so we're going to need help eating them," She laughed. "So, you're a friend from school?" Picking up a warm brownie, Ryan took a bite out of it. "This is really good. Yeah, we got like three classes together. Met him yesterday, he's pretty cool." "He's a good kid. He was talking about you last night after he came home. Said he had to leave?" "Yeah, my mom gets really weird sometimes." Shrugging, Ryan took another bite out of the brownie. "Can I have another one?" "Help yourself. I hope you don't mind country music," she said as she turned the radio on. In the background, Ryan could hear Andy talking to his father. "Late? What time? Ok, I'll tell mom. Love you." "It's the only kind of music I listen to, Lorene." Ryan said, smiling." "Good, maybe you can teach Andy some good taste in music then. What time is your father coming home, Andy?" "He's gonna be an hour late mom, he's stuck in traffic. There's some accident on the interstate." Lorene sighed. "Why don't people drive more careful? What do you want for dinner?" "I'm not hungry mom. We ate at the mall." "More junk food, I'm sure." "Of course! McDonald's as a matter of fact." Lorene threw up her hands and walked into the livin' room. "You're never going to grow if you don't eat healthy." "Who cares?" Andy laughed. "I like being short, makes me more like you!" Andy grabbed his mother and hugged her. Rolling his eyes, Ryan took another brownie off the tray. "These are delicious!" he exclaimed. "Thank you Ryan. At least SOMEONE appreciates my baking." Andy let go of Lorene and ran up to Ryan and hugged him. "You suck up," he whispered. "Andy!" Ryan twisted out of his friend's hug. Lorene started laughing. "Don't embarrass the poor boy, Andrew. Not everyone grows up in a physical family like you did." "You're right mom... but it's not like I kissed him or anything." "Well, if you did, it wouldn't matter, now would it?" "Come on, let's go to my room." Andy pulled on Ryan's arm and dragged him up the stairs. Climbing up the stairs, Ryan nearly stepped on a sleeping cat. Andy picked her up and held her to his chest. "This is Phoebe, the sweetest cat imaginable." Phoebe nestled herself into Andy's arms and began purring. "JESUS it sounds like she's growling!" "Yep, she's got a loud purr. She's wonderful." Andy smiled, and began cooing to her. Phoebe looked up at his face, and reached a paw up to touch his nose. "She likes 'petting' people, and she LOVES to be petted." Ryan reached toward Phoebe and stroked her side. She rolled over as best as she could in Andy's arms and exposed her belly. "She wants you to rub her tummy." "Really? She won't scratch me for that?" "Nope." Andy reached for his doorknob with his free hand and turned it. "Come on in." They walked over to Andy's bed, where he set Phoebe down on it. She stood up and pushed her head into Ryan's side. Looking down, Ryan began petting her head. "Her fur is really smooth." "Yeah, she grooms herself all the time. And she's always coughing up hairballs cause her hair is so long." By this time, Phoebe had settled herself onto Ryan's lap and was purring loudly, clenching and unclenching her paws against his leg. Ryan scratched her behind her ear, and she tilted her head to make it easier for him to do so. Andy sat at his computer and turned it on. "Wanna go online with me?" "Sure." "Cool." The computer finished booting up, so he clicked on his internet icon. Immediately, dial-up networking began dialing his ISP. "You know you can set it so the modem don't make any noise." Ryan remarked. "Yeah I know, but I like to hear if there are any problems." Ryan shrugged. "Your choice man" He kept petting Phoebe. "Man, she's like, really contented." "Yeah. She loves to be petted. Oh AWESOME!" "What? What?" "I got a 48k connection." Andy grinned. "I usually get 46." "Is there a difference?" "Not too much but you can kinda see a difference when you're downloading stuff." "Oh ok." "I'm goin on irc. I want you to meet my friends there." "Cool." Ryan stood up, and Phoebe hopped off and walked between his legs. Ryan carefully walked to the computer. "Here, sit in my chair." Andy got up and let Ryan sit down. Andy typed in a command, and a window opened. "Oh cool, full house tonight." hi andy! ANDY!!! (((((HUGGERS))))) hey boiiiiiii! hi guys. I got my friend ryan here hi ryan! heya ryan hi ryan! is he.... ****?? yeap he sure is :-))) hehehehe cool :) awesome! hi guys hi ryan. u suck andy off yet? ummm nope *** Andy- is now known as Ryan15 what do u look like ryan? um im 5'2, long hair, umm hazel eyes, what else? how big is your ____? hahaha j/k *calklein pimpslaps timmy how much u weigh? whats your waist size? u gotta pic? not telling u that cutebear. croc: i weigh 100#, my waist is 26 and no i don't gotta pic I was just kidding about that ryan :( u sound cute :-) he sure is. u guys better behave, he's MY bf :)) BF?? yay!! -cutebear- congratulations!! I love you!! bbs guys * calklein is now known as cal-cig *** croc15 has quit IRC (Connection reset by peer) * Ryan15 is now known as Andy- sorry guys, but I gotta log off for a while. awwwwwwwwwww I'll bbl :-) I love you andy :) go have fun hehehe maybe ;-) Andy turned the computer off and turned the TV on. "How come you shut it off?" "Cause I really didn't feel like chatting too much. Sorry if you did... I didn't think about that." "Oh no thats ok." Ryan stood up from the chair and sat on Andy's bed next to him. "What you gonna watch?" "Frasier. I like it." "Oh cool so do I." For the next thirty minutes, the two boys laughed and giggled at the tv. Andy turned the tv off and gazed at Ryan. "What?" "Nothing." Andy smiled. "Just wondering how u can be so gorgeous and sweet at the same time." "Oh my god... you're making me blush. I ain't gorgeous." Andy leaned over and kissed Ryan on the lips gently. "Yes you are. And you know it." Smiling, Ryan replied, "Ok, but Im nowhere near as gorgeous as you are." "Yeah, whatever. Just kiss me." "Ryan, telephone!" Lorene called. "Shit." Ryan stood and answered, "I'm coming." Walking into the livin' room, Ryan took the phone from Lorene, and she whispered, "It's your mother, and she doesn't sound too happy." "Ok thanks. Hi mom." "What are you doing at that BOY'S house?" "Watching TV." "I'll bet you are. Get your butt home. You have a lot to answer for." "How did you get this number, mom?" "I don't have to answer your questions, I'm your mother. Get over here now." "Whatever mom. You were in my room again weren't you?" "Ryan if you make me come over and pick you up...." "I'll be home later." "No you won't. You will bring yourself home NOW." "And if I don't?" Susan began screaming into the phone. "Quit arguing with me, Ryan!" "Fine!" Ryan slammed the phone down, then looked over at Lorene apologetically. "Sorry about that." "It's fine. How is everything at home?" "Not too good. Me and mom've been arguing lately. She's being totally unreasonable!" "Well, Ryan, I hate to remind you, but she IS your mother, and I'm sure she's just looking out for your own good." "Not in this case. She's being stubborn and ignorant." "Hmm. Do you want a ride home?" "That's ok, I got to bring my bike with." "So put it in the bed. We've got a truck." "Oh ok. Thanks." Ryan smiled at Lorene. "That's not a problem at all. Andy, I'm driving Ryan home, do you want to come with?" Andy stepped out of his bedroom and leaned against the doorframe. "Sorry Ry, but I'm not feeling too good right now." "That's ok." Ryan walked through the kitchen into the backyard and walked his bike to the front where Lorene was backing the truck out of the garage. Ryan hefted his bike into the truck bed and climbed into the cab. As the truck backed down the drive, Andy staggered toward the front window and collapsed. Halfway to his house, Lorene turned to Ryan and asked, "Mind if I asked what was goin on between you and your mom?" "It's nothing, really." Lorene looked straight ahead, and said, "Okay. Must be a big nothing though. Is this your street?" "No, a few more blocks." "Okay. Well, Ryan, I must say that I hope that you and your mother will be able to work things out. You seem like a nice boy." "I'm sure things will work out. Thanks Lorene." Ryan rested his chin on a fist and stared out the side window. "They will." "This is my turn coming up," he said. Lorene slowed to make the turn, and slowly drove down the street. "Which house?" "That one over there." Ryan pointed. Pulling up to the curb, Lorene stepped out of the cab and lifted Ryan's bike out of the truck bed. "Thanks for the ride Lorene." "Anytime, Ryan. Good luck with your mother." "I'll need more than luck." Ryan said as he rolled his bike into the garage. Andy cracked his eyes open, and pulled himself to his feet. "What the fuck?" He leaned against the wall for support. Moaning, he held his stomach and made his way to the bathroom. Andy lifted the toilet seat and began puking. "I don't want you going back to that boy's house anymore." Susan said firmly. "Why?" "Because I'm your mother and I told you." "So I can't have any friends, is what you're saying!" "Look Ryan, I'm not going to argue about this." "Ok fine. Then that means we're done talking." Ryan stormed out of the kitchen and slammed his door shut behind him. "Ryan don't you dare slam that door again!" Susan shouted. "Like you really care what I do anymore," he muttered. Laying on his bed, Ryan crossed his arms over his chest and stared at the ceiling. The Hospital Andy's fingers traced a path down from Ryan's lower lip, to his chin, to his chest, and finally stopped at his belly button. Ryan picked his head up and gently kissed Andy on the lips while Andy began unzipping Ryan's jeans. Sliding his hand down Andy's back, Ryan pulled his boyfriend toward him until Andy was lying on top of his chest. Andy slid his fingers into Ryan's pants and began playing with his pubic hairs, and then... Ryan's mother knocked loudly on his door, jolting Ryan awake from his dream. "Yea?" he mumbled, half awake. He looked at his clock: 1:15am. "Telephone. It's that boy's mother." Susan said after poking her head through the door. Squinting to block the bright light that assaulted his eyes, Ryan climbed out of his bed and pulled his bathrobe on and walked into the livin' room. "Hello?" "Ryan?" "Yeah, I'm Ryan." "This is Lorene, Andy's mother." "Yeah, mom said it was you. What's up?" "Can you get dressed? I'm going to come over and pick you up. Andy's in the hospital." "WHAT?!" Ryan was wide-awake now. "What happened??" "We don't know yet. Get dressed, I'm on my way and I'll explain in the truck." "Okay." Ryan set the phone down and slumped to the chair. Susan stepped into the living room, and walked over to her son. "Are you ok, Ryan?" "Leave me alone." "Fine. I'm going to bed. You need to do the same." "Andy's mom is coming over. I have to get dressed." "Why is she coming here?" "Like you'd care." Ryan stood up and slowly walked to his room. Susan stared at Ryan. 'We used to be so close... what happened between us?' she wondered. "Ryan." "Go to bed mom." "Ryan..." Ryan closed his door behind him, and dug out a fresh pair of jeans from his dresser and pulled them on. Leaving his t-shirt on, he sat on his bed and began crying. "God, please let him be ok. PLEASE!!" he whispered. There was a knock at his door. "Go away, mom." "Ryan," "GO AWAY MOM!" Ryan shouted, his voice revealed the tears running down his face. "I'm sorry." Susan said from behind his door. "Just leave me alone, mom. You don't understand me, so just leave me alone." There was a momentary silence. "Okay. Want me to let you know when your friend's mother is here?" "Whatever, mom." Ryan wiped his face dry and stared at his wall. ------------------------------------------------------------ He was still staring at the wall when there was another knock at his door. "Ryan? She's here." Shaking his head, Ryan snapped back to reality, and answered, "Okay." He stood up and walked out to the truck. "Hello Ryan." "Hi Lorene." "Your mother's watching. She looks concerned." "Yeah, I'm so sure she is." Ryan looked at Lorene imploringly. "What's wrong with Andy?" Lorene took the truck out of park, and pulled out of the driveway. "We don't know yet. When I came home earlier tonight, he was throwing up." "That's it? Maybe it was something he ate. The way you were talking on the phone made it sound like something really bad happened, and..." "Ryan, he was throwing up blood." Lorene said as gently as possible. Ryan was speechless. "Blood?" he croaked. "They've got him in the ICU right now, but he was insistent on your being there, 'right now' as he put it." "Wha... what happened?" "I don't know hon, I don't know." The pair sat in silence as they drove through the darkened streets. Twenty minutes later, Lorene parked the truck in front of the hospital. "We're here, Ryan." "Yeah... I know." Ryan opened the door and stepped out. The chill of the night air hit him, and he realized that he should've brought his jacket as he folded his arms up against his chest. "It's cold." "Let's hurry." Lorene and Ryan walked briskly into the hospital, where Ryan began rubbing his arms to warm up. Walking up to the desk, Lorene checked up on Andy's status. Ryan watched Lorene talk to the nurse. Lorene nodded a few times, and glanced back at him. The nurse shook her head a few times, and Ryan's heart slumped. After a few minutes, she nodded and said something to Lorene, who then waved Ryan over. "Andy's sleeping right now, but you can go see him." "Okay." Lorene led him to Andy's room, where he walked in reluctantly, and sat next to Ryan. Ryan had an IV in his arm, but didn't look too bad. As he traced a finger down his boyfriend's arm, Ryan heard Lorene slowly close the door behind her. The tears began streaming down Ryan's face as he whispered, "What happened Andy? What happened? You better be all right, or... or..." He sat there for a couple of hours, just gazing at Andy, and watching him sleep. Listening to Andy's soft snoring comforted Ryan. "Ryan?" Ryan opened his eyes, and saw Andy watching him. "Andy." Ryan smiled. "How're you feeling?" "Like shit." Andy said, grinning. "My throat hurts like hell." "Well, don't talk then, silly." "Heh. But you're worth it. You're really cute when you sleep, you know." "I was asleep?" "Yep. I've been watching you for an hour. You were out." "What time is it?" Ryan glanced at the wall clock. "Shit, nine o'clock. And my neck is soooooore." "Turn around." "Huh?" "Don't argue with me. My throat hurts too much to argue." Andy stuck his tongue out. "Hahaha. Ok." Ryan turned around, and relaxed when he felt Andy's hands start rubbing his shoulders. "Mmmmm that feels good." "Yeah, I know." Andy leaned forward and blew gently into Ryan's ear. "I love you babe." "I love you too. Now you better get better soon, or else." "Or else what, hmm?" Ryan thought for a couple minutes, then replied, "Or else I won't give you my 'special medicine'." "Special medicine? I don't know... I'm not too fond of medicine." "This one you would be. I make it myself." "Oh really? What do you use?" "I can't tell you that... otherwise it wouldn't be 'special' anymore." Ryan grinned, then turned around and hugged Andy. "Don't you ever do that again! You scared the shit out of me!" "I won't. I promise you," Andy said as he kissed Ryan's nose. "Andy, here's your.... OH MY GOD!" The sound of a tray crashing to the floor startled the two boys. A nurse was standing in the doorway with a look of horror on her face. Then she got angry. "Didn't your parents teach you morality? Boys kissing boys is unnatural!" The nurse stomped over to the two, and started wagging her finger at them "You two need to go to church and listen to the Word of God more often!" Andy started to get angry at the nurse. "Listen lady, one, what we do is none of your business. Two, I do go to church. Three, keep your nose out of our business. Four, how do you know that we're not just close friends who don't let society dictate to us how to express our affection for each other? You're jumping to conclusions when you don't need to be." The nurse sputtered. "Well, I never! Visiting hours are over anyway." She looked at Ryan and sneered, "You need to leave." "What?? Visiting hours are not over! It's only nine o'clock!" "They are if I say they are. Now leave." Ryan looked at Andy, then looked at the nurse. "I'm not leaving just because you didn't like what you saw." The nurse eyed Ryan with a look of distaste on her face, then turned around to leave. Before she left the room, she turned around and said to Ryan, "It's probably your fault that little queer has AIDS anyway." The Hospital Ryan's mouth fell open as he stared at the nurse. "Wha... what did you just say?" He couldn't believe what he'd just heard. It had to be a sick joke... it just had to be. As Ryan was searching for words, an angry voice wafted in from just outside the room. "Nurse! Get out of here, NOW!" The nurse's face-hardened as she heard the command. The voice repeated its command, and she turned and left the room. "Get in here!" the voice ordered. Ryan collapsed to the floor and wrapped his arms around his knees, and began rocking himself. "No, no, no, no, no, no, NO NO NO NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! GAWDAMMIT NO!" he began shouting. "Ryan, calm down, babe, please. She can't be right. It's not possible, Ryan. It just isn't." "But, but, she's a nurse... she would know the test results..." Andy climbed out of the bed and sat next to Ryan. "That's just it, babe... think about it. Don't HIV tests take longer than just a few hours? And besides, there isn't any possible way for me to have come up positive on one, anyway. She's just being an ignorant bitch." Andy wrapped an arm around Ryan's shoulders and pulled him close. "Use your head, babe. She's wrong." "I... I... I guess so... but,. still... how could anybody be like that? Shit, not even my mom would say something like that!" "I don't know, babe. I wish I did, but I don't. How people could twist God's love like that... I just don't understand how they could expect to get to heaven." "I'm not religious, hun, you know that." Ryan leaned against Andy and sighed. "Doesn't mean I'm not. She's wrong about God. Believe me, she is." "Ok Andy, I believe you." Andy turned Ryan's head with his fingers and gazed into his eyes. "You better." Andy said, smiling. Smiling back, Ryan leaned forward and gave Andy a kiss. "Ahem." The two boys jumped a little, and swung their heads toward the door. The doctor stood in the doorway, with his arms crossed, and an obviously hidden grin. "Enjoying yourselves, boys?" "Ummmm...." "Yep, we sure are!" Andy said, grinningly. The doctor's smile broke open and he began laughing. "Good, good. Well, boys, don't worry about Nurse Clackner anymore. She won't be working this wing anymore. We can't have her upsetting the patients and spreading rumors, can we?" "She said Andy has AIDS...." The doctor frowned, and strode to a chair. Sitting down, he looked at the two boys, and said, "Well, I don't know where she got that idea from. We didn't even run an HIV test. Your symptoms," the doctor continued, looking at Andy, "are indicative of dehydration. In fact, that's what happened. You didn't have enough water in your body, so you got sick. We're going to release you in a couple of hours when we're sure you're all right." "Dehydrated? That isn't possible! I drank plenty yesterday." "What did you drink yesterday, Andy?" asked the doctor. Andy thought for a moment, and replied, "Well, we had lots of coke." "That's it? Yesterday was pretty hot. You should have been drinking water or sports drinks. Coke is not good for hydration. The caffeine in it will actually prevent hydration." "Oh. I didn't know that. So Andy can't drink Coke anymore?" "Of course he can," the doctor mussed up Ryan's hair as he spoke. "You boys just need to make sure that you drink water as well. I see no reason he can't go home, once he's fully hydrated." "When will that be?" Ryan asked. "Later this afternoon, I think." Turning to Andy, the doctor continued, "I also think that it'd be best if you took it easy at school tomorrow, just in case." "Awww, I have to go back so soon?" "That's up to your parents; but, there's no reason you can't bounce right back. You boys behave yourselves, and don't tear up the hospital." the doctor turned and left the room. Enter Jerrod, stage left An hour later, the two boys were both sitting in Andy's bed, and watching Ricki Lake on the overhead TV. Ryan's head was resting against Andy's shoulder as they watched the fascinating story of a mother dating her daughter's husband. "Why do people watch crap like this?" Ryan asked. "I mean, seriously - what purpose does it serve?" Andy shrugged. "Damned if I know - all I know, is that it's hilarious. Hard to believe that shit like that actually happens." "Well, yeah, it is funny, but it's still stupid. And, why do people go on TV to humiliate themselves like that? I mean, SERIOUSLY - they've gotta be fucked in the head, and..." Andy put a finger on Ryan's lips. "Hush, babe. Just watch the TV and laugh." He leaned over and kissed Ryan's forehead. "You're silly." Ryan suddenly stopped, and turned his ear to the door. "What's that sound?" Andy muted the TV, and listened. A faint squeaking sound was coming from down the hall, and getting louder. "Probably just a nurse pushing a cart or something. Now stop worrying about what's going on out there, and cuddle up with me so we can watch TV!" "Yes sir!" laughed Ryan. A moment later, there was a knock at the door, and a shaven head poked in. "Hi. Doc West said I could visit?" Ryan and Andy looked at each other, and at the new kid, He was taller than both of the boys by about 6 inches, and had bright crystal-blue eyes which seemed to pierce into their souls. Andy scooted up in bed, and said, "Uh, sure - come on in." The other boy's face beamed as he smiled and pushed the door the rest of the way open. He was wearing a blue hospital gown, and was pushing an IV cart - which squeaked as it rolled across the bare floor. He had socks on, and shuffled across the slick floor to avoid slipping. "My name's Jerrod," he said as he made his way over to the bedside and sat on the edge. "Doc West said that we had something in common..." Andy, ever the bold one, looked at Jerrod, and asked, "Oh? What do we have in common?" Jerrod flashed his shiny smile as he answered, "I'm gay too. It's cool that y'all are boyfriends. I heard Nurse Godzilla arguing with the Doc earlier about you two. What are you in for?" Andy blushed a little. "Dehydration - nothing really big." "Wow. I wish that was all that I was in for," Jerrod smiled again as he pointed to his wrist tag, "I've had leukemia since I was 10. Been in remission 3 times, but it's come back really hard a few months ago. But I'm gonna beat it, if only because I'm a stubborn s.o.b." "I - I'm sorry to hear that. That's really got to suck bad." Ryan stammered, not really sure how to act. "Nah- no need to apologize, dude. It's not your fault I got stuck with some bad genes. What's your name, by the way?" "I'm Ryan, and this is Andy." "Cool." Jerrod smiled again. "How long have you two been together?" "Only a few days," Andy replied. "You've got an awesome smile, dude." "Yeah - it's one of my better features. Most of the time, though, I'm just a little bitch. I hate hospitals, and how the nurses always want to dictate every part of your stay here. Especially Nurse Godzilla. I really don't like her at all - she's a complete bitch... especially about gay people. I haven't told her I'm gay, because I don't need to have her on my case all the time." "Well, the doctor said that she won't be on this ward anymore, so you won't have to worry about her anymore." "Yeah - this ward, Ryan. She works in the cancer ward, where I'm at, so I have to deal with her all the time." "Oh. So, uh, do you have a boyfriend?" Ryan asked. "I used to." Jerrod's eyes dimmed somewhat. "He died last year. Jeff had the big C too, but it was too strong for him in the end." Neither Ryan, nor Andy could say anything, so Jerrod continued, "But, don't worry about it. Jeff is in a better place, and I can sometimes feel his presence. He isn't hurting anymore, and that's what's important. I still miss him a lot, but I don't cry as much as I used to. Besides, it's good for me to talk about him - or so my shrink says." Jerrod's smile returned, and a mischievous glint appeared in his eyes.

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