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By Michael T (assumingly) Submitted by MichaelT() Date: 2002 Jan 24 Comment on this Work [[2002.01.24.01.56.7395]] |
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A guy friend asked me what women want from us. As if I would know! But being a loudmouth, I tried to answer anyway. If you don't want to see me just go off, skip the long answer. :-) Short answer: Everything. Flippant answer: Another pair of shoes and a large bank account. Long answer: I would guess that it's when you can give her exactly what she wants before she asks for it and sometimes before she even really knows what it is. It's also taking chances with her that she wants you to take in a way that doesn't threaten her or make her feel unsafe and makes her feel mostly in control. She wants to feel both safe and powerless yet totally in control at the same time in every situation with you. This is why some chicks dig horses. They're big and powerful, but once she's got one saddled and bridled, she feels like it will do her bidding. But the thing is the horse isn't guaranteed to do her bidding, and she knows that the only power she has over the horse is the power the horse lets her have. Heck if you buck and kick every once in a while it gets her off both mentally and physically. They also like feeding and brushing the horse. Unfortunately doing this sort of thing requires spending lots and lots of time figuring her out slowly and seeing her exactly how she is -- or -- fate just happening to make you enough what she needs when she settles for you. I've never found fate. Part of being a good guy is making that effort to really know her. Of course you usually don't have a tremendous amount of motiviation to do this until you're starting to get regular sex in exchange for it. Or you're a stalker. Or a "booster" (a just friend who makes her feel good about herself but has no real chance at either being "the one" or "the potential one" or even simply getting into her pants). And actually, I've never made a woman happy for longer than a couple months at a time so what do I know? All of this is just conjecture I've dragged of talking to, watching, and studying women. I really know how to make a woman mad at you. I'm provably good at that. :-) Of course, the other problem with women is that you can't just give in to her. You have to make it interesting and fun for her to drag it out of you. If you're a pushover with women Some American women go through a wild phase where they chase after guy after guy after guy that isn't good for her-- he's not what she really wants -- but then she doesn't know really what she wants -- it's just that he's unattainable and therefore worth the time. American woman. Stay away from me. American woman. Mama let me be... She's not really aware of it, but she's constantly judging your fitness as a mate. Even if you aren't with her, she's doing it. And sometimes -- even if you know what she wants - you can't give it to her anyway. Don't have the money, time, physique, attitude, whatever... Love and sex is maybe 1/3rd physical and 2/3's imagination and getting inside the other person's head in a good way... From what I can tell, women play games. As much as they hate to admit it, they play games. And you have to learn her rules, and get her to play in your game and by your rules too. Women who say they don't believe in games or hate games have just lost in the game playing versus somebody and are a little upset by that. A good woman won't play games for very long and will be very up front and clear about things once she knows you love her though. Of course I've only studied the minds of maybe a dozen women in detail, and so most of my knowledge is book/magazine/movie/talking to random women knowledge -- my "hands on" experience is limited to a much smaller number of sources... There's this funny saying about knowledge. If you want to know how it's supposed to be built, ask an architect. If you want to know why it can't be done, ask an engineer. If you want to know why it's theoretically possible or not provably possible, ask a mathematician. If you want it built, ask a carpenter or a welder. If you want to waste your time, talk to a philosopher. And if you want to know how to build something? Get a hammer and some nails and start working.... And if you want to know anything about how to make a woman happy -- do not ask me. Or rather -- don't do what I do. I've been trying to find the answer to a different question -- "what would make me happy?". I thought I had it answered but the question is really -- what would make me happy that I can actually get and build upon? I dunno... Not yet. And even if I did, I'm a poet and an engineer. I'll describe in lyrical imagery why it's so beautiful and wonderful, and then tell you why it can't be done. Where is that nail? |