By JustL with Urenda
Submitted by Just L
Date: 2002 Jul 23
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Mining for Answers

“Unearthing heavenly words to interpret my mortal insides”

(Once again I find myself liberating Urenda’s words
from various pieces to serve my own purposes - letter to my husband - when my emotions are deep but my words are shallow. Thank you Kevin for sharing your often-parallel journey. I appreciate you, your poetry and your soul.)

It has been said far more eloquently than I,

when you place your faith
in someone else's heart
you cannot later
claim that you made a mistake
for this is the
most conscious choice
a human being can make-

we’ve allowed our fears
to keep us from yielding
willing ourselves
to the love of the other
and in vain
given birth
to unconscionable acts-

We cannot find the one answer
deep inside us
our words cannot go there
naturally, the language of skin has lost its beauty
and that place - that feeling - that emotion
is simply excruciating.

I am, instead, taunted by words with no answers
spread out on the living room floor like counterfeit oracles
The Oregon Divorce Kit
The Dictionary of Cliches
Depaak Chopra’s The Path to Love
Ativan 1 mg three times daily as needed for anxiety
Yoga for Dummies
The Monster’s Ball
The Best of Dells’ Crossword Puzzles #62
Spiegel Fall Winter 2002
Edward Weston’s Forms of Passion
as if to say
"you are the only us in the universe
who cannot find that one beautiful thing – the one answer."

And your face, your touch, our dreams are not among them.

Just L
July 23, 2002