Fate, the old gal's sometimes been kind
(dare I rouse her anger now?)
she put your eager loving hand in mine
(sure, I worried her a bit, I vow)
But you might consider her other side
(yeah, that one that looks like my mother)
the one that sent you on this wild ride
(next time I bring the dramamine, lover)

Do you feel you got the best of it in life
(lie to me, sweety, I need a real break)
when you blurted out you wanted a wife
(here's a chance to write of heartache)
Who unleashed the tongue and torrent
(okay, I threw the first ashtray and chair)
that later brought you close to a warrant?
(my attorney on speed dial IS SO fair!)

Did you think we two could still be best
(only ribbons we ever got was police tape)
when under what seemed house arrest
(okay, okay, I'll drop the charges on rape)
Would you do it all again for the lust
(oh, baby, oh, bayyybe, oh, baby, my ass)
or have you finally found a love to trust?
(next time you come here -- bring cash!)

(c) Maggie Mink aka Rennie Lorca