I once wrote an ode to the leaking boat you row'd, and another about the garden you never hoe'd. And a ode to your durned howling blue duck. And your cheap rat-trap 4 x 4 pick-em-up truck.

Then there was the ode to your nagging mother, yeah, and one about your durned bumming brother. Plus, I found another stinging ode I almost forgot -- old expensive-cheap gun that you sneaked and got. Which reminds me about my ode on groping buddy Bill. I used that hairtrigger gun to chase him off this hill!

And there was a sad ode about your little paycheck,

and it going for a beer party on your big bass boat deck. A mad ode to your banker for giving you that loan, that made it possible to buy her that home! NOW I'm really getting down to it, an ode to a banshee; my ode to your girlfriend when she turned all of 20.

I guess these odes were something I never showed,

or our divorce and your temper would have blowed! But I still got a few more odes simmering in me, of one kind of aggravation or another. I'm tossing them out everywhere soon for free. So tuck it in, baby, or run for cover!