By Cire Nehtrow
Date: 2002 Dec 20
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[[2002.12.20.13.02.31333]]

Laurels

Precious fractured lover mine with hurt and guilty eyes,
Do you not feel the span of time, the depth of tortured soul?
With which I love your broken heart, your lost and angry self;
Myself it yearns to die with you a million timeless deaths.

Codependents psychobabble and loveless ponies rhyme,
Yet is my love all sham and fluff, or endless giving mine?
Project your doubts and shame into my heart, into my mind,
Mine own I have and ever close, no need to help me find,
The rust and dents in armored shell, I know them very well,
I choose to leave them, see them, watch them, tarnish over time.

"I love you more than you will ever know", I acquiesce to clichéd line,
For it decries my sorrowed heart and swollen soul and mind.

When we first met I felt in you a heart of giving need
I loved the promise of your whole, and broken pieces lied.
I loved and love your tender lips, your bright and shining eyes,
Your glossy hair, tremulous smile, your ever tantric air.
Your foolish whims and passing plans to change your hollow bits,
The way you glance and wordless mark the same said faults of mine.

So you've lied to me a thousand times and other lovers kept,
You've hid from me the double lives of many former selves;
Kept lying still and said you neither like nor love me now,
Yet close you pull me in our bed and on my chest your brow.
Your staring eyes and sighing breath and stroking hands belie,
The love and kinship under all, the death grips in our hands.

The nonsense and the selfish games of childish egos lost,
The warring of the grown-up fears that wake us in the night, 
Of losing all the things we have and losing what we want,
Don't lose us in that war on self, crown laurels on the victors us.