By spaceman Date: 2003 Feb 22 Comment on this Work [[2003.02.22.11.20.4902]] |
There is a constant war being waged in my head, behind my eyes a small battle is fought every shaky second of every uncertain day, a question battering back and forth in the confines of my mind: is today the day? The day I lose my grip, the day I sabotage myself and give in to the still-lingering lure and lust of liquor, the day I decide that I don't deserve you after all and do something so dreadful that you can't possibly forgive me. Is today the last time I will look at you and see wonder, contentment, serernity in your eyes, will I cause them to fill with fear, loathing and derision instead? Or will I hang on tight, white-knuckled but willful, and let you believe in me for one more day. |