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By Violet Date: 2003 Dec 28 Comment on this Work [[2003.12.28.05.00.10421]] |
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where do you go when you're empty inside? sadness pours out of me like guttered rainwater i am alone even when we are together i am a puzzle even to myself so many pieces and so little time want want want i can't separate the need anymore feeling bent on a pair of black slingbacks with pointed toes as if they were the key to my happy existence i was sorely disappointed to leave without them $69.99 is too much right now when there is debt up to my eyeballs and rent to pay falling down would be so much easier if i could give up i would on school on work on me as i know myself the only thing i like about me sometimes is my husband and he is his own person so who am i? i am a fragile young woman with a lot of stress with a lot of luck to be where i am with my mother's voice in my head telling me to be thankful with the image of my father's back as he is walking away from us from me i am a girl that is full of impatient energy i love my husband i want a baby i want to run a marathon and i love shoes there i go... wanting again i am tired i feel worn down and burnt out and angry with myself i am tired of being controlled by birth control pills they fuck with my hormones and no matter how sweet and understanding my husband is when i cry for no reason i know he must think i am crazy because i do and i am i don't have a religion so i can't pray and i don't want to but i wish i had more answers and less noise |