By courtney
Date: 2004 Dec 11
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[[2004.12.11.00.37.16950]]

The Edge

He returned to his split personality, and I returned to my slap from reality, to falling down an elevator shaft.
The truth is, I like the evidence of love between people. I know there are those who thrive on being alone, but how?
How, when they know the cereal box will empty only when they finish it; when they walk into a house where, rather than evidence of life lived together, there is only the quiet imprint of one...
I have blonde hair with split ends, I am left handed, and I must have someone to love.
So here I stand again, arguing over the feeling in my chest, so strong I begin to wonder if something really has split...
And I look at him. This man that's the very reason my tears
are more real than I am. He claims he seeks redemption.
"What do you miss?" I ask. He smiles, actually sneers and says, "I miss everything. The way you were always there for me, how routine we have become."
His words were a pin-prick, and I deflate. The act is bullshit. The sneer says it all. Routine has no undertone of romance...
What I wanted to hear is:
I miss the freckles under your eyes.
I miss that you have 5 different smiles, and how I know each one.
I miss that your skin is enough to soothe the cold
of the world...
And then, I felt it. A deep sense that if I took one more step towards him, I would fall off the cliff. And finally,
after all the times my heart was stretched out, in hopes of finding the perfect fit, I realized I wasn't ready to take the plunge...