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By Ali Date: 2007 Sep 25 Comment on this Work [[2007.09.25.22.52.14620]] |
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I turned it all around, just to get to you. Just to get underneath your skin, again. It wasn't an accident, even if it looked like one. It was a tactical maneuver. A simple phone call, initially. But all the simplicity turned to blinding chaos, the very minute I heard your voice. Maybe I knew that I'd go weak in the knees, or that I'd fall--even as I stood on my own two feet. I had changed, and grown up. I had. I was brilliant, educated, different. I am. But in other ways, I was/am the same girl you knew. You made me crazy. And you still do. And tonight I'm sitting here, contemplating many things. I miss you. I don't want to, but I do. I have so much to say, but saying it comes at a cost. There are two ways to go, really, and I wonder which is wiser (or if any is wise, at all). Telling you what I feel is almost always my first impulse, however unsafe that may appear. But I've always been a soul-naked kind of girl. Woman. Girl. Person. I deserve better than these circumstances. I need more. But I want you. Funny...how that works. I love you. From the inside out. |