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By Ali Date: 2007 Nov 09 Comment on this Work [[2007.11.09.08.50.18748]] |
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Maybe you're not a glitch in my good armor. (That's assuming that I truly had any to begin with, right?) Or something I suffered when I was breaking or broken. Maybe I was wrong. I can admit that, you know. Of course, as it stands now, I'm only admitting that to myself. Because you're certainly not here. But it's strange, how my heart seems to lean and lunge in your direction, when I'm falling apart. And I'm unraveling into every surface of every star, fast enough to spin inside out, and make my whole world dizzy. I wish you were here. Isn't that crazy? I don't even know what I'd say. How I would explain, as if this was as simple as it, superficially, seems. Or...even if you'd be willing to listen. But I'd be interested in the option. You know? I feel too many things right now, and they all seem to erupt in fits and starts, straying in all directions, tarrying in bits of darkness. I've been crying. That's not something I like to admit. But my face looks like a punching bag. And I just wanted you to be the one to want to sit with me, when I don't even want to sit with myself. God, I could use your shoulder right about now. As ridiculous as that might, technically, be. I don't care. If I could call you, I would. (Would I? I don't know. What would I tell you?) Scratch that. If I had my way, you'd call me. Immediately. But I don't have my way, now do I? I don't know whose way it is I have, exactly, but I'm pretty sure I'd prefer a different version. You know, if they're giving them anyway, or something. Door number three sounds like a good option. But, you know, I've never felt the need to just be close to someone, so much as this, right now. I guess it turns out I've found the irony, after all--but I'd like to exchange it for something else, if that's okay. Damn, I wish you'd call... |