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By Ali Date: 2008 May 09 Comment on this Work [[2008.05.09.09.16.27569]] |
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There's a world in this space. A world, a universe, a war. A siege on my heart. I wonder if yours is unscathed, or if I'm simply the only fool, jumping in, now and again. I don't really know what happened. Whether you said goodbye, and I missed it. Or whether you thought I did. But when I said...that your words and your actions didn't match up, that was true. It's easy to say things. Words are simply heartbeats, steady. Controlled. Rhythmic. But actions? They are a sandstorm smile, a battle cry into silence. A showing of causes waged and worth waging. I never thought you were a knight. Not quite as the stories depicted. And that's okay, but I never quite resembled Cinderella. I'm too proud and too stubborn. And I hate to waltz. But I know, I pushed you, sometimes. I just wanted you to push back. I trusted you, and maybe I shouldn't have. But I just wanted to know. I wanted proof. I didn't just want to believe. Though, I did. And that was, perhaps, my most fatal mistake. But now there's this space. This chasm of a thousand letters, unsent. Of a thousand thoughts, unsaid. There's a war there, in this strange, new universe. Captive, my heart is bolted into place, clutching its fraying logic like a blanket. Like the last heave of an argument. I'm not winning, and I know it. Because in the middle of everything, I miss you. And that thought kills me, still. |