BK~..you're writing in cinquain,,,,,so cool! and good too!
t.
Alice~
I love the gift...the story and the painting. Do you sell your art online?
terry~
Thanks for teaching us how to write a cinquain!
Ali~
Glad you enjoyed the scene! I may submit more later.
You're welcome Misti...keep 'em coming! I'm a member of a writer's forum now that forces you to learn and grow.....I love it!
terry
Misti~ i think that the line in tori amos' song where she mentions "jeans of his with her name still on it", I think she compares herself to a mermaid because mermaids cannot wear jeans and even if she could wear his jeans she'd never fit in. Its kind of like she is saying that she will never be able to replace his old love. Because she'll always be the one who wears his jeans. I think that she use "jeans" to explain his heart and how she'll never be in it, but she stays silent when deep down she knows the truth. Do you get what I am saying?
I went to that mountain
when roses blossom
hearty pigeon cries out loud
for a piece of soul
every corner of darkness,
or light!
Terry ~ I like your cinquain -- "my love". It flows nicely. If it weren't a cinquain I wouldn't see the need for the last line though. "To come" is implied by "Waiting for soft spoken answers", but I can't think of a better way to say it. Maybe "from you"? Just critiquing. All this religious stuff pulled us away from saying stuff about poetry. Also, I like "Don't go". Don't have a good comment about it though.
Bk ~ like the bump. You two are grindin!
Chris ~ "Get Gone" seems very real. I like the dialogue. It doesn't seem fake or contrived, which most of the dialogue I try to write seems.
scqueen ~ I like "love is pink". Though I don't think love is pink. Maybe a deeper shade of red.
There's much more wonderful stuff to say something about but I'm going to sleep instead.
Megs ~ If you're still out there, take care of your heart. You need you as much as he does -- and I don't think he's going anywhere right now....
No, Michael...last night love was pink.
(sigh)
Sc, are you boasting, or advertising?
Happy for you girl...
And Dee?
Knock his argyles off!
Gala
Gala ~ since you asked... I came home yesterday to a dozen of the sofest pink roses you've ever seen and six bottles of my favorite wine (not all for one night, of course). So I was merely answering Michael's comment about love being a shade of red. Ok, I guess there's a little boasting in there. Needless to say, I had a wonderfully surprising night :-)
Chris~
Your screenplay is shaping up! I want you to make a goal: at least two scenes a day! Then when you finish you can submit it to Bad Kitty Films or Project Greenlight! I love you soooo soooo MUCH! Have a carpe diem day! I'm going to miss you!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Angela~
Yeah, I get what you're saying. I heard somewhere that Tori is an incest survivor. My understanding of the "what if I'm a mermaid" line is a reclaiming of her childlike innocence and a rejection of her sexual adult self. I could be wrong. As for the "jeans of his with her name still on it" I always thought that she felt eclipsed by his former lover. I don't know. I just know that "Silent All These Years" touches me in a powerful way. I always cry when I hear it. I always sing along.
(green with envy)
scqueen-
if only... "pink" was a good read. I take it not as boast or advertisement, but celebration.
love for me has been blue of late (fading to black).
(at least I am feeling colourful!)
k
(yikes!)
that didn't read correctly. I think. Actually I didn't (think)... Which is why comment doesn't look quite right.
sc-
I MEANT that it WAS a good read. Very evocative. The "If only..." was all about me being wistful. Wishing I were in the pink. Alas. Sorry for the malapropism.
(skulking off in shame)
k
Kev, no offense taken, I knew what you meant! Thank you. And I hope things cheer up for you.
Hi,
i just visited this site and i think it's fascinating and touches me to the very soul. i hope to send in some stuff later on.
Latest headline reads "Blizzard Knocks Out Power to 80,000 in Massachusetts" Kirk, I hope you're ok and staying warm. Let us hear from you when you can.
Scqueen ~ ok. so yesterday was pink. :-)
Oh, I'm fine. Power's no problem and I'm enjoying a 4 day weekend. It's hilarious actually-- there was no realy reason to take Monday off for anyone, but they were playing up this snow so much so early, that people were even cancelling things Sunday evening...even when *nothing* was supposed to happen 'til midnight Sunday.
It's heavy snow though. But I think it's not the snow per se, it's the people by the shore with crashing water who are having the problem, and I'm inland, relatively speaking.
Sc---Good for you girl...
And Kev!
And for everyone else---since Terry had taught us something
new...hhmmm..Sir Cinquaine?
I like it!
Kirk ~ I lived in PA for a few years and before the blizzard of '96, people bought all the milk and bread with barely a prediction of snow. I laughed and thought they were behaving like the South Carolinians that I grew up with. The joke was on me. We were literally snowed in the house for at least 2 days! Take care.
Michael T. ~ Thank you :-)
Thanks, Michael! I don't know where this thing's going. I'm just writing.
Ali- Where are you??? Your muse MIA???? Write soon I miss it!!!!
xoxo
Elaina
this is a really good place to get lost in
thanks, melissa - i quite agree. it's also a great place to hold your own mini-catharsis. with the added bonus of love and support from rather loyal people :-)
angel - i must disagree with you. rather than lame, i found your ciquain to be rather poignant.
BK ~ Sorry, I just realized I named my cinquain the same thing as you did! ('It's You')
*blissed sigh* One more sleep..... I wish I found shiney blissed out love as inspiring as broken and bent love... I can't seem to write or paint anything any more.
(Not saying I mind that at all right now)
I've just read through all the new cinquains.... I'm well impressed.
Terry, follow through on the lesson, Haiku is a Japanese art.... where did cinquain start off?
Deevaa and Argyle sitting in a tree...
K-I-S-S-I-N-G.....
Thank you, slug and you, too, Terry on your comments on "softly, as a ring".
Nice Cinquains, Terry.
Pinky,
'I Saw You'... Hmm. You raise The Question there, don't you. Figure that one out and there are no mysteries left to be solved.
:)
Wow...you guys amaze me!
scqueen~....I loved 'warmth'
Kevin~ same to 'my rose'
Tanqueray Cowboy~ Wow....loved them all.
Angel~ 'Windows' was deep for so few words...Bravo.
And Dee...the cinquain form originated in France around 1910 as a derivative of the Japanese haiku form. In its early form it had very tight rules. in other words the first line had to be a noun, 2nd line two descriptors, 3rd line three verbs, 4th line a complete thought tying together all the above, and the 5th line either repeated the noun or completed it in some way. Another interesting fact, Both haiku and cinquains were used as a means of communication between lovers. They answered each other back and forth in this form as a means of verbal seduction. Neat huh?
terry